Saturday, February 19, 2011

In which I am disappointed. Quite a bit, really.

SO, I've had on the calendar that today, 10 AM, is a Primary Activity for the kiddos.
So, my mom left as I took the kids to the church for the activity.

I had tried to call a friend in the Primary Presidency to find out what the activity was. It was announced that there WAS an activity in the bulletin I had from two weeks ago. Yeah, two weeks since I'd been at church. I hate being sick.

Bucket was working at building it up for Bruise. She had told him that I was taking them to a SURPRISE, to a FUN PLACE.

As we are driving, Bruise pipes up, "Are we going to DA CHURCH?"
Me: Yup. We are.

And, here, I went on telling him that the Primary Presidency would make it a fun place, since all the kids got to play together.
(And ... well, I was kinda looking forward to figuring out something to do with myself for the next two hours.)

And we get to the church. There are cars there, which is a good sign.
There's a HAM Radio class in the Relief Society room, a couple people are cleaning the church, the Young Men are playing Basketball in the gym/cultural hall.

Hm. No Primary kids anywhere. Huh.

So, we walk around and wait for over ten minutes. People can be late.
I try and call a few friends to see if they're on their way or if the activity ISN'T at the church or whatever.

Finally I call one of the kids' Sunday School teachers.
"Oh, no, it was cancelled. There won't be anymore quarterly Primary activities. It was announced in the new handbook. They announced it at church on Sunday. Oops! You weren't there, were you? Well, have a fun family activity!"

Yeah. Okay. Right.

After we drove back home (and, I'll admit that I cried all the way home. And still am, really), the kids put on a movie and Bruise is playing on the DS.

Yeah, it's stupid that I'm upset. It's a stupid situation.
It's stupid that I was sick and missed the announcement.
It's stupid that no one thought to call or email all the parents to make sure that the announcement made it home ... or in case some families weren't at church to hear it.
It's stupid that they didn't have a sign on the doors.
It's stupid that I didn't think to call anyone to ask if the activity had been cancelled ... mostly because the activities don't get cancelled a lot.
It's stupid that I'm disappointed because I worked to build up the kids' excitement for an activity that ... didn't exist. And that makes me feel like a crap parent. And really, really stupid.
It's stupid that I waited around for someone to ask about the activity to show up. And no one did. Because everyone else is smarter than I am and KNEW that the activity no longer existed.
It's stupid that today proved a total waste of makeup. Because I looked cute. To go nowhere and do absolutely nothing ... which is fine since I look TERRIBLE -- all red, puffy, and blotchy from crying -- now.

Yeah, I'm kinda pissed.
That being  ... not totally truthful.
I'm really, really disappointed. And frustrated. And a little pissed.
But mostly disappointed and frustrated.

The gospel is still true.

But, no, I'm not feeling like such a happy, little Child of God right now.

I'm going to remove my streaked/mostly-cried-off mascara and foundation.
Maybe redo the nails that I smudged on the rush to drive the kids to an activity that didn't exist anymore.

Then, perhaps, I'll just curl up in a corner and pet my hair or something else equally productive.
As soon as I stop crying.

Truly, at first, I was all excited for this activity.
Michael and I could run errands without the kids.
But then, I was reminded that he had that HAM Radio class. And refereeing the Young Women's basketball game (at the other church building in town) ... so, yeah, instead of a little date with my husband, I was going to be hanging solo. Which isn't nearly as much fun.

And, yeah, I attempted to make impromptu plans with a friend. And nothing came of THAT.
So, yeah. Whatever.

Just let me pretend to be totally emo and mope for a bit.
I'll be better in a bit.

I just look (and feel) like total crap right now.


Hilary said...

As long as you just look and feel like crap but not smell like crap, then I'm good with it! :-P

I'm sorry about today! I hope you have a better night and tomorrow! I figured out what I am going to put as your text tone (I'm trying to take your mind off of things by changing the topic)...

Jennie said...

oh, I'm sorry! Things like that tend to be a breaking point don't they? So uh... no primary activities ever? again? Ok. the church is true, i sustain the leaders, but some things just lack common sense! Like we can no longer use visuals to teach primary children... umm hello! That's how they learn! Somebody is not quite clear how children develop! Ok, I'm done, and I'm not apostosising (yes i have crappy spelling)

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