Getting into the Groove

Things are mostly going well. (I mean, we have a house, we're pretty healthy ... my computer's still not up and running ... But still.)

Friday was a little busy. We got up, went out to get a Christmas tree (and I made sure to put up a note for the UPS guy to leave the package (my new hard drive)) and a wreath. We stopped back by the house in order to drop off the tree (since we couldn't close the van all the way with it sticking out like it was. ^_^) and I ran around to the front of the house to hang up the wreath ... and intercepted the UPS man with my package. He seemed pleasantly surprised that I wished him a "Merry Christmas."

Then we took the kids over to the dollar store so they could pick out a gift for each of their cousins ... to help them remember that Christmas is about GIVING, not getting. (Also Michael had the kids send me an email telling me what they wanted to get for me. Bucket would like to give me a princess. Bruise wants to get me a light saber. ^_^). Bruise had a little trouble figuring out that he was getting something for his cousin that SHE would like. And Michael didn't want ME to choose what she should receive. So we made a compromise: I would give Bruise an option, "Would ___ like THIS or THAT?" And he'd choose. And we did this a few times. And I think that, yes, she WILL like what Bruise picked out.

Then we went home and put up the tree. And had the kids attempt to take a nap. Some of our attempts are more successful than others, get my drift? :P

That evening, we took the kids to the Creche and then to the lights set up at the local Pepsi plant. Bruise was rather a pill (putting it mildly) at the Creche, but after grocery shopping, he cheered up.

When we got home, the kids refused to get ready for bed until we had decorated the tree. So we did that with "help" from the kidlets. (And some "help" later from Diana-cat ... who thinks that the God's eye I made about eight years ago is put on the tree especially for her to knock down and chew on. *glowers*)

Saturday, we tried to load XP on my hard drive (and FAILED. Repeatedly. Oh well. I'm sure that I have some wonderful techie friend who'll come save this damsel in distress. Sometime. ^_^) and picked up the house and eventually bundled up the kids to go downtown to the holiday parade (and the lighting of the community Christmas tree).

It was cold ... but not absolutely freezing. And, as we were about to get back in the car (skipping the free holiday concert, since the kids were tired and cranky), a certain little child had an accident and peed through his/her clothes. At least this said child wasn't IN his/her carseat when it occurred.

Sunday was ... pretty normal. Our Bishop has strongly counseled us to start (if we haven't already BEEN ... *shifty eyes*) praying EVERY DAY for those who we Visit- or Home teach. (Along with the people whom we serve in our callings -- for me, that means praying over the Young Women by name every day. And, I'll admit that I've been horribly lax about it. Because, face it, I can be lazy. But I'm doing MUCH better). And, as part of our Visiting Teaching, we have been assigned sisters (who don't have/do not want Visiting Teachers) to pray for.

The two sisters that my companion and I have been assigned ... I don't know them at all. But I do hope, like I've prayed, that they'll feel the Lord's influence in their lives and know that He loves them.

I still don't totally, totally feel completely in the holiday groove ... but I'm getting better. I'm almost finished with reading Shepherds, Why This Jubilee? by Jeffery R. Holland and that has helped. I've dug out all the Christmas-y Children's books to read with Bruise and Bucket. I'll read The Best Christmas Pageant Ever (Barbara Robinson) and The Forgotten Carols (Michael McLean) this week. Those always help. Even if they make me cry. But it's a good cry. And it's usually just what I need.

Leaving church yesterday, Bucket had quite the bloody nose. Like, it was on her jacket sleeve, cheeks, and FOREHEAD before I realized what had happened. She looked like a car-accident victim there for a sec. We ran the kids out of the church to the car as fast as we could, as I cupped my hand under Bucket's nose to prevent any blood spots on the carpet. THEN, after I got her wiped off a little and some Kleenex in her nose, she had to go BACK INSIDE to go potty. *sigh*

I finally watched Romancing the Stone last night. It wasn't bad. But, golly-gee, there's quite the amount of language in there!! And, for parts of it, the kids had gotten up from their nap and were watching it while cuddling with Michael and me. So I'm all, "So kids, are those NICE words or MEAN and NAUGHTY words? Do you want to use nice words or mean words?" No, I'm not mentally unwell at ALLLLLLLLLL. NOOOOOOOOOooooooooOOOOOOOO. Where'd you ever get THAT idea?

Today, I HAVE to do the dishes and laundry. And clean up the tornado-aftermath that is our living room.

Also, I think that Charlaine Harris is one of my new favorite authors. I'm almost fully caught up with the Sookie Stackhouse series (the ones that are the basis for TrueBlood ) and I read Grave Sight (the first of another of her series) this weekend. I really like them. Yes, they do have sex in them ... but they're much better than Twilight (to me, at least). If Twilight's like bubble-gum, Harris' works are more like .... dark chocolate hot cocoa. Or something.

Okay. Now to go be productive (on those Facebook games ... :P)

Not feeling it ... yet (Feedback PLEASE)

Now, I'm going to confess something: We are living in a material world ... and I am a material girl.

I shouldn't be. I know that there are many, MANY things in this world that are better than what money can buy. ... But, sometimes, I just feel a little bad that I don't have a trust fund/money tree/ something.

Right now, I've done NO Christmas shopping. Because we haven't had the money to do so.

And I HATE not giving gifts. I love to give gifts. Giving gifts at Christmas makes me happy. If I were in a financial situation to do so, I'd spoil my family.

And, at this moment, since I can't do that, I feel a little down ... and not very Christmas-sy at all.

Which is really stupid. I mean, did Jesus come to earth to give everyone a gift card? I think not. He didn't come to give material legacies. And, therefore, I shouldn't feel like a loser because i don't know what to get for my grandfolks, parents, and nieces and nephew ... let alone for Michael (Though, really ... for him? I have a very easy, inexpensive option. Hurr hurr. <-- Michael, you didn't read that. And if you did, just act surprised if that's all I get you.)

I'm having a little trouble finding a quick, easy solution to this dilemma of feeling a bit Scrooge-like and off this Christmas season. (Every other year, I've HOPPED to on the day after Thanksgiving to crank up the Christmas tunes, since Michael is STAUNCHLY against Christmas music before Thanksgiving's over. Every other year, you can find me gearing up for decorating and getting a tree put up and gifts bought [and wrapped sometime before Christmas morning] ... But this year? I know that it's only three days into December ... but I'm ... just not feeling it so much. And it kills me. I know that, yeah, most of my music is on that other hard drive ... but i might have a good chunk backed up on the external. So, perhaps tomorrow, after I install the new hard drive and get it running, I'll be able to crank up the Christmas tunes. And, if I can't get them playing THAT way, I do have Pandora or last.FM, which would work. ...)

So ... I am asking, what are you doing/what do you do to feel the Christmas spirit?

What are some favorite Christmas songs? (I, personally, prefer the less secular ones. I know, I'm a snob. I put up with Rudolph, Frost, and the Chipmunks for the kids' sake. Snoopy, at least, has that whole "Peace on Earth" message. But, if I'm listening to Christmas music, I want to hear about Baby Jesus ... or, at least, about that warm feeling inside. And if you try and tell me to listen to "Christmas Shoes, " I will give you the TEACHER LOOK that I've perfected by student-teaching and being a mother.

THIS is that look, as done by Tommy Lee Jones:

I don't want to give that look. Please don't make me give that look.

(FYI: Other "Christmas" songs that will incur that look are "Last Christmas" by Wham! and ... oh, I don't remember, since I've spend the last 330-or-so days trying to rid it from my brain. And, for the present moment, it's seemed to have worked. Thanks be. Let's not mention those songs. Let's do pretend that they've never existed.)

But, please, please, PLEASE -- Give me some good ideas of things that I can do to get out of this funk (this funk that I can only hope to attribute to that evil ***** Mother Nature. [Dear Mother Nature, I hate you. Stop making me a crazy, heinous witch every month. Stop making me be all bloated and overly-sensitive. Also, if it's going to be this FRAKKIN' COLD, let it snow. just enough to make a snowman. Thank you. Sincerely, me.])

Here are the things that I HAVE done:

• drank chocolate-mint Rooibos tea (YUM. Dianne, you have awesome friends. Since they are how I ever learned that such a wonderful creation exists.)
• Set up the Nativity scenes that I have -- my Playmobil one, my Calico Kittens one, and the kids Little People one.
• let the kids watch "Frosty the Snowman" and "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."
• Put up TWO Advent calendars (so what it we used one last year ... it's about the NATIVITY. So it should totally be used again!)
• I sat and sang some songs with the kids. But they weren't very amenable to that. Impatient little hellions. (Good thing I mostly love them, right?)
• I've talked to the kids about WHY we celebrate Christmas.
• I'm gearing up for St. Nicholas' Day ... Dec 6. Put out your shoes!
• We're going to go to the Community Nativity Festival this weekend. (If you're in the area, you should totally go. Seriously.)
• In our town, there'll be a parade, lighting of the community Christmas tree, and a concert on Saturday.

I mean, I have some good things to do to help me get into gear. I even plan on making some cookies for our neighbors. Even the ones that we haven't really met. Who is going to be sad to receive cookies? It should be a good thing, right? I hope.

But, really, if you have some secret formula for feeling all warm, fuzzy, and full of Christmasosity, pass that knowledge on my way. I'd appreciate it.

Do1NiceThing

Today I registered to be a potential bone marrow donor. (Honey, I hope that's okay. Sorry that I didn't ask you first. I'm headstrong like that. :P)

But I was reading last week in an old Readers' Digest magazine that my mom had passed onto us ... and there was an address for Do1NiceThing (www.doonenicething.com).

And, well ... to put it bluntly, I can feel guilt for having nice things. I mean, I really have a LOT to be thankful for. Things that I really do take for granted: a wonderful husband, great (usually) kids, a healthy family, I don't have to work outside the home, we have a house, we have two vehicles, we have running water and electricity, we have a working computer (just the one for right now, but STILL!) ... I mean, compared to, what, 90% of the world's population, even though I can't just go out and buy a new wardrobe at the drop of a hat (or a debit card), I'm sitting really pretty.

I have a family that is healthy. My kids don't have cancer. I have not outlived any of my children.

That's a huge blessing.

And ... well, like nearly any American woman who grew up during the 90s, I've read Lurlene McDaniel books. I KNOW that not every child is healthy. Heck, there are adults with cancer or other diseases ... And I'm healthy.

Even though sometimes I feel a bit guilty because, compared to lots and lots of other people, I have things ... easier.

And, because I really am grateful for the things that I DO have, I feel ... not OBLIGATED, per se ... but that I SHOULD and DO need to help out in what little ways that I can.

If we had more money, I'd definitely be doing some of those kiva.org loans. I'd give a larger fast offering. I'd donate to the Perpetual Education Fund. I'd love to buy some families a cow or something awesome from Heifer International. ...

But, since I do not have all those funds at my disposal, I do try to do some cool things. And, over at Do1NiceThing, they have a list of some that I really like. TheHungerSite allows you to click daily, and for each click, the sponsors donate money or food to those in need. (There are also the sister sites for breast cancer (donating mammograms), literacy (books), animal rescue (food for animals), child health (to cover costs for kids' healthcare), and rainforest (to help conserve that resource).) FreeRice will donate 10 grains of rice for each question (in the subjects of art, geography, languages, chemistry, and math ... you choose your subject) you get right. Xerox has jumped on the wagon of doing cool things with their site, LetsSayThanks, where you can select a postcard and message to send to U.S. Military personnel who are serving overseas.

I know that these are small things. Little things. And most of them only take a minute (though I have, at times, spent about an hour at FreeRice). But ... it makes me feel a little bit better. I like knowing that even though these things barely cost me any time or effort ... they will help someone to feel better or get well.

Speaking of, I need to donate blood the next time the blood drive's around. Yes, it does take more time (and planning ... now that I have my munchkins. I don't know that they'll be quite ready to sit with me as I lose about a pound. Though, come to think about it, when they CAN sit for that long, I should just bring them with me. ^_^) ... but it isn't hard (unless I almost pass out again. I hate it when I do that. *sigh*). And one pint of blood can help up to three people. I mean, that's pretty cool, right?

(Besides, I have some kinda funny donating-blood stories! If you really want me to relate them, just let me know, okay? I'm willing. Some are slightly more ... not quite embarrassing ... but they are kinda funny.)

I mean, it'd be pretty awesome if I WERE a superhero and could totally change the world so that everyone had clean water and enough money to ... I don't know ... keep a roof over his/her family's heads. And take a family vacation or something. And never have to worry about how to pay for their food or bills.

(Or heck, if I could just be all, "Okay, you evil-doers! You are going down! And all your resources are belong to us!" And then I could redistribute everything more fairly. But that's not how it works. Because, face it, I might use part of my portion to buy shoes and books before paying off the credit cards or something like that. ... Okay, I'm not quite giving myself the credit I deserve ... but people shouldn't be FORCED to do good things. They should do it because they WANT to. I'm just sayin'.)

Yeah ... that's most of what's going on around here. Some good things with a large serving of guilt on the side. Hey, that's how I roll. :P

Gratitude Challenge - Days 20 and 21

Assignment: As the challenge winds down, write a thank you note to yourself. Thank yourself for taking the time to stop and focus on all the little things for which you feel grateful.

Okay, self, you heard 'em. Thanks!

Now get back to work.

KIDDING!

I am glad that I've done this challenge. Especially this year. It's good that I kicked myself into gear and did this.

Day 21 Assignment: Reflect on the 21 days of the Gratitude Challenge and what this process has meant to you.

I think that it's been a read godsend that I did this project when I did. I don't really know how else I'd handle the truck and my computer breaking down during the same week without going stark raving INSANE.

I mean, I could focus on the fact that my children seem hell-bent on sending me to the mental ward (or perhaps Hell. Just sayin'.) ... But doing this challenge has helped me to look past most of the daily crap and see some of the really good stuff. (Gosh, I'm so eloquent! :P)

Today hasn't been my best of days ... I'm VERY irritated that the kiddos will not take a nap. And they haven't for a few days. ... And don't try and tell me that it's because they don't need it. Believe me, THEY DO. You should see how cranky they are when they don't take it. ... My home isn't a very serene place at present.

But there's always tomorrow. And, from doing this project, I'm better able to focus on the fact that the crap-stuff is temporary. And that it will pass and things will get better. And all I really have to do is to just get through the bad stuff. Like in Firefly (Wow, I really quote Firefly a LOT, don't I?), "You're stronger than this thing, honey ... This is a moment in time. Step out of it and let it happen."

And, yeah. ....

So, I've done it. I've made it through the Gratitude Challenge. Let's hope that it made me a better person and all that.

I'm tired, though. Really tired today. I'm gonna lay down and read now.

Gratitude Challenge - Day 19

Assignment: Have confidence in all the choices you have made today and be grateful for being able to believe in yourself.

I'll have to work on this one. I don't always make the BEST choices. But I am very glad to have the option and opportunity to be able to choose.

And it's nice to think that my choices today will bring opportunities in the future.

I was reading my email and this was one of the quotes that I received today:

"For those who are discouraged by their circumstances and are therefore tempted to feel they cannot serve the Lord this day, I make you two promises. Hard as things seem today, they will be better in the next day if you choose to serve the Lord this day with your whole heart. Your circumstances may not be improved in all the ways which you desire. But you will have been given new strength to carry your burdens and new confidence that when your burdens become too heavy, the Lord, whom you have served, will carry what you cannot. He knows how. He prepared long ago. He suffered your infirmities and your sorrows when He was in the flesh so that He would know how to succor you."

--Henry B. Eyring, "This Day", Ensign, May 2007, 89–91

Isn't that neat? I LOVE Elder Eyring. He's completely awesome.

And, really with how the blessing that I asked Michael to give me last week ... this really is hitting home. Since I've CHOSEN to try my darndest to do what Heavenly Father would want me to do ... since we work hard to pay our tithing and be honest and all that good stuff ... when we can't make it on our own, we'll receive help. And, yes, I don't necessarily expect to open the door and find that someone's left a $50k check made out to yours truly (Though, really, wouldn't that be NICE? Nice, yes. Realistic? Maybe not so much.) ... BUT we'll be able to get through our trials. That's good to know. Reassuring and all that.

It kinda reminds me (in my Whedonistic- Firefly-addicted way) of one of the quotes from "The Message" -- "When you can't run anymore, you crawl. And when you can't do that, you find someone to carry you."

(Gosh, don't I love it when the Gospel and shows that I absolutely adore AGREE? It just makes me feel squishy inside. In a nice, geeky way.)

But, yeah, with this challenge, I can work harder at trusting myself to make good decisions. And I can work harder at actually MAKING those good decisions. Like making sure that I find a time and DO my personal prayers and scripture study. Or start having regular prayers before mealtimes and in the morning with the munchkins. And, like, making healthy snacks for the kiddos. All good things. All good opportunities which I should take advantage of. ^_^

So, I have two more days of the Gratitude Challenge. ... Let's hope that I stay this well-adjusted days 22+. :P

Gratitude Challenge - Day 18

Assignment: For the past three days, you have focused on appreciating what makes you unique. Write about all the things that make you so lovable. Take a moment to appreciate your personal style, talents, and charm.

• I laugh easily. I find lots of humor in life.
• I can cry easily, too. But I much more prefer to laugh.
• I try to be honest ... but I also work not to hurt people's feelings.
• I'm really good at shelving books. Fast. And accurately. This is one reason why my people at MY library love me so. (That and I have cute kids that I bring to visit them. ^_^)
• I write with inflection ... just like how I talk. Sometimes that doesn't always work in my favor. (Darn those writing standards essays in high school!)
• People find me creative. I don't neccessarily agee ... but I do have a rather singular view on life.
• I can quote movies. LOTS of movies.
• I can sing. I have decent pitch. I don't mind singing in public ... I prefer singing in a choir (especially now when I don't sing nearly as often as I used to).
• People tell me that I give good talks. That's usually because I use LOTS of quotes. Because lots of other people have said things better that I would. ^_^ And I don't mind THEM getting the credit. They deserve it.
• I'm very sentimental. I have acute attacks of nostalgia.
• I eat my vegetables.
• I have a nearly-insatiable sweet tooth.
• If given the chance, I would easily stay in bed all day, reading.
• I'm better at paying attention to books than to movies nowadays. Why is that?
• I try and consider other people's feelings.
• I like to dance. And to watch dancing.
• I'm rather good at baking, if I do say so myself.
• It appears that I have a good memory ... sometimes.

I'm pretty alright, if I do say so myself.

And, hey, you can always jump in and comment. :P

Gratitude Challenge - Day 17

Assignment: Write about something you feel grateful for in your life today.

Just one thing?? It's been a really good day! (And, yes, I'm writing this Wednesday. But, so what?? That's how I know what a good day it's been!)

• My mom came up. AND she's staying until THURSDAY (usually, she's had to take off as soon as I've gotten back from volunteering. Bonus time with my mommy? AWESOME.)
• Michael's company is allowing him to drive one of the company vehicles. This allows us to be a two-car family. I'm going to be able to take my kids to storytime! I'm going to be able to do my VISITING TEACHING, y'all!! This is GOOD NEWS!!
• Mom and I went grocery shopping and Bruise and Bucket were well-behaved in the cart.
• As we went shopping, we got a turkey for Thanksgiving ... 15 lbs = $3.37. YES, REALLY.

It's been an AWESOME day!!

I mean, really. A good day. Also, we had pizza. Yum! And REALLY GOOD apple cider! And we paid the cell phone bill. Good stuff.

Gratitude Challenge - Day 16

Assignment: Stand in front of the mirror for five minutes and focus on at least five things that you love about yourself. Write them down in your journal.

• I have nicely-shaped eyes. And they're a cool color. ... And bonus -- no unibrow! I lucked out there!
• I have shapely ankles ... especially when I wear heels.
• I have pretty nice skin ... especially after that round of Accutane when I was a Freshman in college. (Stupid inflammatory acne.) But I don't have lots of wrinkles or anything. And my dimples can be cute. ^_^
• I have nice, long fingers. And the ones that still have long nails make me especially happy. I've gotten used to my stubby, little thumbs. I'll never be a concert pianist or anything (but mostly due to the fact that I hated practicing, so I never really did).
• I have very straight teeth ... and, no, I never had braces. When I was little, I thought that EVERYONE got braces and glasses at some point. Like a rite of passage or something. I mean, it's like ALL my friends did. And I never did. I kinda felt left out for a while (I'd still like glasses. It'd be nice to look smart and all. ^_^ ... And, really, how weird is that -- Blind man begets daughter with strong eyesight? Okay, he wasn't ALL the way blind then, but still!) I've had dental hygienists ask me if I had braces when I was younger, so that's flattering (my bottom teeth are a little crooked, so don't get me wrong. It's not like my teeth are perfect or anything.)

So, yeah, there are five things that are awesome about me, physically. I am grateful for my body. it may not always be what I wish it were (oh to be bird-boned and dainty! Makes finding clothes a LOT easier! Especially cute vintage-y things!) ... but it's strong for its size and it works. I can incubate feti, nurse, carry heavy things (like Bruise and Bucket at the same time), type, do bits of yoga or dancing (when I'm motivated to do so ... which should be a lot more often, truly). I can see, smell, hear, taste, and touch. I can walk, run (a bit), leap, carry, and lift. I can type, thread a needle, make a bed, wash dishes. I can scrub a bathtub or toilet or floor. I mean, overall ... besides some idiosyncrasies in the packaging, per se, it's a great body to have!

(And by idiosyncrasies, I mean the fact that I'm ... zaftig. I have very healthy curves. I'm a little bit FLUFFY. I carry my food storage supply on me. I could be skinnier ... but, really. Put Paris Hilton and me out in the desert and see who survives longer. Hands down, it'd be me. ... Unless i cave and start sharing the inside-the-cactus water and grilled snakes and bunnies with her. Because I might do that. Just sayin'.)

Why my kids are cute ...

Since Mother Nature and I are not on speaking terms (the little harlot with her little gifts ... like INSOMNIA), the kids and I are watching DVDs in bed while I work at garnering the energy to make breakfast.

Bucket had checked out My Little Pony's Biggest Tea Party Live! (Exclamation point included), which is a recording of a stage show with people in costumes. The ponies look like giant marionettes, but without strings and with someone inside the front legs.

When she had picked out the DVD at the library a few days ago, I had remarked that the ponies looked scary. So, as I put it in the player this morning, she said, "Oh, we get to watch the scary show, Mom?"

And just when I thought that my kids didn't ever listen to me!

Also, yesterday, when the kids went down for a nap, I went to bed to read and sleep (since, as I mentioned, Mother Nature has blessed me with that monthly gift which includes a crapload of insomnia ... which is very annoying to my dear husband. Truly, I'd like to fall asleep earlier. *sigh*) and, when Bruise woke up before his sister, he watched the newer (live-action) The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe with Michael. And, when Michael asked him about the story, Bruise actually showed good recall of the story.

... Except when Michael asked why Aslan went to the stone table. Instead of saying that he was making a sacrifice or something, Bruise's answer was, "'Cause I SAY so."

Also, Bucket tells me that I'm a princess. Very sweet of her.

And, yesterday, when I was putting their clothes away, Bruise told me, "Mommy, you NICE."

(cue: Awwwwww!!)

It's stuff like this that makes up for some of the stuff I deal with. ^_^