Thursday, November 08, 2007

Just streaming my consciousness ...

I know this is totally beating a dead horse ... BUT ... what is the big deal about breastfeeding in public?

I totally am very blessed in the friends that I have. They put up with the fact that I feel breastfeeding is important ... and that I enjoy it. That I'm an extended breastfeeding mama.

I know that there are people out there who don't feel that children who can ask to be nursed should be nursed. And ... well ... I used to be one of them.

And then I became a mother. A mother who enjoys nursing her babies.
Even when they got older.
Even when they got teeth. (I consider myself VERY lucky that I only got nipped a few times. ...I still get nipped once in a while. However, I like being needed and adored.)

I'm not sure how to wean my munchkin brigade, even if I wanted to.
Part of it is that I'm kinda lazy. It's so dang easy to feed and offer comfort this way.

And, really, I can't find any downsides.

My children love me.
They know that I love them, that I will provide all I can for them.
I've lost weight.
My chest is getting smaller (For me, this is a HUGE plus!!!!).
My children rarely get sick.
I've never had to deal with an ear infection. I've dealt with a few colds, Bucket's case of croup, and the flu. Still ... when I hear that there are moms of singletons out there whose children get cold after cold after cold, I consider myself extremely lucky.
It's frackin' CHEAP. I mean, really. I've probably saved at least a thousand dollars (that we DEFINITELY don't have to spare) on f0rmula.

Now, I'm not a person who's easily offended much. (I usually rise up for a sec, being all, "Whatchoo SAY??" ... and then back down. I'm not into confrontation. And, more often than that, I usually just feel HURT that someone thinks that I'm not doing what's right/smart/ethical/whatever.)

But ... I can get a little worked up about breastfeeding. I guess it's my thing.
Maybe I'm a breastfeeding NerdFighter. Well, at least a breastfeeding NIT. (Nerdfighter-In-Training for those of you wondering what the Helen I'm talking about.)

I do have to say that I think it's a little crazy/hypocritical/whack that in our society, breasts are fine if they're in a push-up bra or selling cars ... but if someone has the audacity to sit on a bench in the park or mall and nurse their child ... Oh, help! I think I have a case of the vapors!

Now, I understand that some people may feel jealous that someone can easily nurse her child ... there are quite a few ladies out there who have had problems breastfeeding.
And, yeah, it would be hard to see someone doing something that you've had problems with ...
But that doesn't explain why the vociferous anti-nursing males of the population are so against it. Maybe they're jealous for another reason? *broad wink. nudge, nudge*

Still ... what is wrong with a baby (or small child) getting food from mammaries? I mean, why else do we have breasts?

And, I have a strong inkling that it's not to sell cars or Victoria's Secret.

Now, since my little leeches are not the most ... sedate ... of nurslings, I usually try not to nurse them in public anymore. Especially since now I can carry around such wonders as Goldfish crackers or fruit snacks.
But ... for kiddos less than a year to 18 mos old, those things aren't an option.

I think it's insane that people want to demand that a nursing mum shouldn't have the right to leave the house. Because, oh the horrors, they'd have to WATCH. HER. NURSE.

Now, let me get this straight. Your rights are being infringed upon because a baby needs to eat ... and you, as an adult, cannot of your own volition AVERT. YOUR. EYES.

Wither the Fries?!?!?

I believe that the baby has as much, if not MORE right to eat in public.
And all this talk about "discrete?" ... That's what a nursing mom TRIES to do. I'd like to see these people try to keep a wet cat/octopus-chimera attached to their chest without flashing some skin.

*sigh* Yeah, I get caught up in this. And I talk and talk and talk about it.

Also, the whole argument that men, upon seeing a breast (even one with a baby attached) will lose control of their thoughts and all ... I don't think that we're trusting our men enough. I believe that they can control their thoughts.

And that it's not my job to do it for them. They are adults. And it's not my brain.

It's like blaming the rape victims for not wearing pants/a longer skirt/saying "no" forcefully enough/being a little flirty/changing her mind/etc.

Which brings me to the whole topic of accountability. And I could spend another week on this (if not longer).
Which would bring me to talk about my stance on elective abortion (I feel it is not needed in our society. We have very good contraceptives. We have many families that would love a child to lovingly raise. And, really, if one cannot accept the fact that no form of "safe sex" is 100% safe ... then maybe that one shouldn't be playing roulette that way. And yes, I know that it's totally not-PC to think that people might not have sex ... but really ... Even I know that one can do many things that don't carry the risk of pregnancy or STDs ... and a good bunch only involve one's self.) (Yes, I have read some smut, thanks. I'm not a complete innocent that way.)

*sigh* See what happens?

And in case you're wondering, since I'm obviously going to bring up all the controversial topics that I can think of now -- I circumcise. Well, I don't do it myself ... but I have had my son snipped.
Not for religious reasons ... but partly because I think it's more aesthetically pleasing (and I'm the one who has to change over 75% of his diapers) and easier to clean. (And, hey! One of the nurses at the kids' pediatrician's office was SO glad. In her experience, she's dealt with so many little boys with painful UTIs. And the common link? Not snipped.)

And yes, I DO know that there IS probably something wrong with me that I cannot fully appreciate the beauty and wonder that is the uncircumcised penis.

But you know what? I also prayed about it. And I don't feel guilty.

(And yeah, when a commenter on a blog that I had commented on regarding my reasons for snipping said in their comment that I was wrong to think that my son's penis wasn't beautiful and perfect as-is [pre-snip], I was a little offended. ... Then immediately I stepped back and thought, "Dude, what do I care? okay, so they think I'm messed-up and crazy. Who cares? I'm the one who's changing diapers and seeing it everyday and having to clean it. And also, why do I care what this complete stranger thinks about me??" [Which, if you know me ... I'm a bit of a people-pleaser. I want everyone to like me. And I'll beat myself up for not achieving this. Usually. Not this time.])

So, yeah. I refuse to feel guilty about that.

Just like I refuse to feel guilty for not having a string of lovers, for not drinking or smoking, for not swearing like a sailor (anymore) ... for accepting some things on faith, for trying to see and think the best of people (well, I TRY. I never said I always succeed on that one).

Seriously ... I have lots of other issues to beat myself up over ... I'm not going to feel guilty over enjoying breastfeeding my kidlets, circumcising my male offspring, or being against abortion. Or big tobacco.

Like not having my kidlets already potty-trained. Or spending too much time on the computer and not teaching them their 123s and ABCs. Or not spending enough "QUALITY" time with Michael. Or not always studying my scriptures (it's more of a skimming. Not good enough). Or not having a firmer bum. Or not having the house in good Feng Shui Chi order.

Now those are things I can feel some guilt over.
Wallow in it.
Let my skin get all pruney.

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