Eyring Quote

"There will be noise and people around you most of your waking day. God hears your silent prayers, but you may have to learn to shut out the distractions because the moment you need the connection with God may not come in quiet times." - Henry B. Eyring (Priesthood and Personal Prayer)

This quote ... I like it. I need it.

I am way too distracted and need to get better at focusing.

Ocean of Emotion

What have you missed since I last blogged?

Not a whole bunch. Me being lazy and reading a lot.
My mom getting the munchkin brigade to CLEAN THEIR ROOM.
Michael and I applied for our passports ... not that we have a trip planned yet or anything.
I cut my hair (it needed it. Now, instead of being between my shoulderblades, it's jaw-length. And, overall, it feels healthier).

Michael and I went to Chef's Night Out in Eugene.
I, of course, FREAKED OUT before heading down ...

• What do I wear?
• It's a stinking CHARITY EVENT (Don't get me wrong, I love philanthropy)!
  There will be men with their TROPHY WIVES there!
  I will bring shame upon Michael!Shame on his company! Shame on his cow!
  (He doesn't have a cow, you say? WELL, THERE'S THE ONE THAT I'M HAVING NOW!!)
• What if I'm overdressed? What if I'm underdressed?
• What if I have to TALK to people and I say something declasse? 
• What if I spill my drink or food?!?
• Do I look like I'm trying to hard?
• ... Oh, hell. Fix the undereye makeup. Add some damn green liquid liner. It'll distract from the waves of fear and desperation you're giving off.

You think I'm kidding ... the plethora of rabidly-begging-for-input texts that I sent Michael and the tear-stains on our coverlet prove otherwise.

By the time I got down there (after wonderful C [who I Visit Teach] came to watch the kidlets came over, Bruise and Bucket arrived home from school, and I kissed everyone good-bye), after some en-route car karaoke, I was better-prepared mentally to deal with ... people.

I should say that I DO like people. Dealt with in small groups, I'm FIIIIINE.
But, well, when I don't know them and I'm not performing as someone else and when I feel fat and I'm on my period and there are angry bees that hate me in my head ... I'm ... vulnerable and more than a little sick-in-the-head.

Just keeping it real for you all.

I mean, usually, I can accept that, yes, there's more of me to love than average. I've got curves that won't quit. I love food ... and don't love to exercise. Or sweat, actually. Give me a book, a BLT, a rainy day, and a cuppa rooibos chai ... I'm a happy camper.

Put me into a social situation that involves dressing up more than in a jersey knit ... with strangers ... who have money (our tickets were given to Michael's company since they worked on an awesome project to combat hunger) ... and, well, I go into crisis-social-mode, obvs.

Good times, good times.
Once we GOT there ... and the pre-event schmoozing was over (so I didn't have to pretend like I knew what I was doing there), I could be proactive and go on the hunt for sampling bazillions of yummy things (I'm not that into chicken livers or pork pate. Good to know. But, DANG SON, I found some Ginger Lemonade that I can buy over at Market of Choice ... now I have TWO go-to drinks there [The other is the Rose Lemonade that you can pry from my COLD. DEAD. HANDS. ... though I also like the Dry Sodas -- esp. Lavender, Rhubarb, and Blood Orange.]).

Michael and I practically ate ourselves sick ... but there were SO many things to try ... and we hadn't even tried them all. And we didn't have seconds of anything!
(The Wild Duck cafe's Beer-Cheese soup? Yum. And there was a cantaloupe salsa with avocado. And a roasted-carrot chicken curry. And a rosewater panna cotta. And a sweet potato cobbler with lavender-caramel sauce ... and more ... and it was all really good).

See ... social events = STRESSFUL.
Food events = GOOD.
So, once it changed to a FOOD EVENT, I was good. No more stressful than getting lunch at the county fair, right?
(OH gosh, I sound like some antisocial bumpkin ... probably because I am rather a somewhat-antisocial bumpkin.)


Also, my Nana has been moved into an assisted-care home. With her dementia, it had to happen.
But, still ... I ...

I'm supposed to write her a letter every couple of weeks ... because I know that I want to keep in touch with her. And she can't hear well enough over the phone. And she doesn't have a computer, let alone know how to email or anything.  ... But ... it's tough. I don't always say how I feel. Because I don't want to be all "Hey, Nana. Your dementia makes me mad. I love you. But dementia sucks. And I know that it has to be worse for you. But it's sad. And it makes me feel like I've lost you and am mourning you before you have died. Because it's like part of your IS dying NOW. And I hate that. And it makes me feel selfish that I'm griping about the fact that I still HAVE you and I CAN visit you ... and it's not the same. ... Even if I could visit, which I try to when we can ... there's a part of me that wants to break down and cry about your state of being you-but-not and I just want to go back about 18 years to when I could walk with my dad down to your house and you'd feed Sarah, David, and me strawberries-fresh-from-the-garden with a splash of cream and a heaping spoonful of sugar. And Sarah and I would dress up in your costume jewelry and nightgowns and feel so grown up and we'd go and "help" Pop-pop mow Mrs. Weatherbee's field and tramp about in the garden and everything. I miss the smell of the attic at your old house back home. I miss riding in the backseat of your peach-colored Chrysler. I buy Freedent gum to keep in my purse because that's what you always had. And coffee candy. Even though it makes me feel like the most rebellious Mormon girl. Because these things remind me of being a little girl at your house during summer afternoons. And I was so very content then, without grown-up responsibilities ... and I really miss that. I really miss you. And I HATE that dementia has taken you away from us ... from me ... before death has. Because it makes me mad. And it makes me sad. And it makes me feel powerless and vulnerable and ineffective. Because I have NO IDEA how to fix this or what to do... I mean, I GET that I need to rely on the Lord and all. But it's not the easiest thing to do all the time. And I'll be walking in a store or in the library and I'll be hit by this WAVE of GRIEF, hard enough that I find myself breathless, reeling in its wake ... and I ... I ... I just don't know what to do.  And I don't like that. And I don't know if it will be any easier when you're fully gone or if I'll just feel more guilty for not knowing how to appreciate you more while you are here. I love our visits, even if you are more and more childlike each time I see you ... I'll admit, though, that after I get into the car to go, I mostly just want to curl up into a ball in a corner somewhere or lose myself in a story ... because I don't know how to handle losing you more and more. And that makes me feel selfish. And guilty. ... But I'm glad that you ARE around. That Bruise, Bucket, and Bubbles get this chance to know you here, as their great-grandmother. That they are able to witness your love for and fondness of them. That they're able to catch some time with you. I barely knew any of my great-grandparents ... so I know how lucky they are. I think I'm mostly just mad that, even though I've got my heels dug and and am shrieking for you not to go, that the dementia keeps dragging you away, piece by piece, until I'm grasping at the grains of sand running through my fingers as those grief-waves wash over me, leaving me soaked and chilled and frustrated-to-tears by my ineffectiveness. But I love you. And I want you to know that one fact. If you know nothing else, I just want you to remember, to KNOW, that we love you."

...

I mean, I could write that to her. It'd be honest. And one reason I don't like the letters/cards that I send to her is because they seem disingenuous ... all prattling on about how we love her (true) and what the kids are doing (true) and that we're fine (true) and we miss her (all too true) ... but that elephant is in the room and I am averting my eyes from its presence. And that feels dishonest. But it doesn't feel proper/kind/whatever to bring it up -- "I hate dementia. Dementia sucks. Dementia is ... I don't know what it is, but I don't like it." ... even if I did say those (true) things ... it might upset Nana more than it'd change anything else. So ... well, I don't see the point of doing it. 

I don't really know of anything else I ... strike that. I can report that Michael and I have now been married 15 years and ... some-odd days. I'm refusing to math right now.
And we went to the coast and ate good food and bought clothes.
I now have a rainjacket that fits me. And has a hood.
Michael got some new slacks, shirts, and ties.
We ate Monte Cristos at Gracie's Sea Hag ... and they were worth the wait and the effort!
We also went to Ripley's Believe it or Not ... just like on our honeymoon (but it was MUCH better weather this time).

And, I had signed up to sub for a Relief Society Lesson.
I figured that, hey, I'm teaching Sunday School ... why not just add on another lesson, right?
Originally, it was for March 6 - Joseph Smith.
Then it was bumped to March 13 - The Atonement and Resurrection of Jesus Christ. Okay.
THEN it was rescheduled to be the Teaching for Our Times Lesson - "Strengthened Through His Atonement" by Dallin H. Oaks.
And, did I mention that it was Easter Sunday? The Sunday that our Ward choir was performing in Sacrament meeting?
Yeah, no biggie, right?

Well, I crammed. A LOT. I'd been studying multiple talks by apostles and people (all the ones that Elder Oaks referred to in his talk. And a few more. Because WHY NOT?) ... including an excerpt from Lighten Up by Chieko Okazaki.

Well, I referred to the outline I wrote. The classroom clock wasn't working. My phone (with its clock) was in my purse. Along with the tissues that I really needed.
But the sisters all participated in the discussion.
People said that it was good.
I survived.
And I'm glad that it's over.
But it felt like it went well.

And I was VERY tired that evening.

And THAT's really, as far as I can tell, all I really have to report. 

Now, I should write that letter to my Nana.

Wow, I suck at keeping this updated ...

Good thing you still love me, right?

I couldn't sleep last night.
I'm sure it had NOTHING AT ALL to do with the fact that I had two HUGE cups of Dr. Pepper when we went to McDonald's yesterday. (My mom came up, since it was a no-school day.)
Of course, after I finished the ebook I'd checked out on my library app, I checked our bank balance.
And FINALLY Michael's paycheck came through before any overdrafts (way to cut it close, right?) ...

Still, it was pretty frustrating, since he is supposed to get paid on the1st and the 16th ... and this is the NINETEENTH DAY of the month. I thought that direct deposits were, you know, scheduled in advance and all that  ... but, yeah, whatever.

I hate adulting sometimes.
Especially when you don't have tons of liquid assets (that you THOUGHT you'd have) the morning of your twins' birthday party.
(Good thing it was a small, family party ... They'll get together with friends ... sometime. Especially since one of their friends doesn't celebrate birthdays, so she couldn't come to a BIRTHDAY-thing ... but she COULD come to a playdate-thing, I'd hope.)

But, yes, tender mercies of the Lord: =No overdrafts. (phew.) We had cash that covered (and had some leftover) lunch for us, cake and ice cream and drinks (and plates, napkins, and cups). We had enough food in the house to cover meals without scrimping. Our bread wasn't moldy. The milk hadn't gone sour. (And, even if it HAD, Bubbles is still receiving WIC, so that's nice).

I came to a conclusion, which I wasn't thrilled about ...
Michael and I keep thinking about (someday) building our "dream home" and what we want in it.
We go about this VERY DIFFERENT WAYS.
His way = design a floorplan. Ask me if I like it and what I'd prefer to see. I waffle on the whole thing.
My way = Create a Pinterest board. On it exist NO floorplans. Rather, it's filled with ideas for decorating and organizing. Or cool ideas to integrate INTO rooms. Again, not what Michael had in mind when I told him about that board.

SO, as I was thinking (in the shower, since that's where I do my best thinking for the most part nowadays), I realized that a big reason that I haven't planned on designing actual SPACES (besides my crack spatial skillz /sarcasm) is because deep down, I'm scared that we'll never have the money to actually DO it. And that realization ticks me off, since it feels like, in a way, I'm doubting my husband and his ability to provide for us ... which is stupid. And I DON'T LIKE doing stupid things.

Last week, I was crap at studying (let alone READING) my scriptures. I need to do it. I KNOW I need it. I have a class to prepare for, let alone that it's a GOOD thing that we've been COMMANDED to do.
This week has been better so far.
After church, I holed up in our room for a couple hours -- changed the sheets, looked at the lessons to be covered, read through next week's Relief Society lesson, caught up in the BoM365 (read the Book of Mormon in a year) schedule ... It was nice. I felt productive.
Yesterday morning, since I wasn't in any rush to get dressed or whatever, I started looking through the lesson I'll be teaching in RS in a couple months (Originally, it was going to be lesson 5, about Joseph Smith. BUT, due to needing to reschedule things due to a Stake Broadcast added into the calendar, I'm now teaching the lesson about the Atonement and Resurrection. It's a great lesson (not that the JS one wasn't ... but I like this one a lot and am not at all upset that I get to teach it)) and I read a conference talk, since I do need to go through those a few times (I didn't highlight in my November Ensign yet. Later).

I do need to work on saying sincere prayers ... and having formal, little prayers ... as opposed to just little statements of gratitude or what I need. Prayer is more of a conversation with our Heavenly Father, so said our High Council speaker on Sunday. It's not like text messaging (that's what I'm telling myself).

I'm still having dreams, every so often, about that bestie who's dropped out of my life.
I mean, yeah, I still miss her. But ... well, in my dreams, she's always ignoring my presence or trying to actively avoid me. And, usually, I find her and tell her point blank that I still love her, that I miss her, that I hope for the best for her.

They're not the most happy-making of dreams. But, at the same time, I'm not sobbing or irate or whatever else when I wake up. So ... yeah.

I'm enjoying my new class of students (in church, you usually change classes based on your birth year. So, I have all the students who are starting 2016 as 12- or 13-year-olds. I had a lot of students (all but one, actually) during that last quarter of 2015 who had or would turn 14 before January 1st.
I miss my old class, yes ... but I'm having fun getting to know a new bunch (and making sure that I get everyone's names right).
The Sunday before (being the 10th), tradition continued ... in that I had another adult join my class (usually for observation. It's enough to make a girl nervous!). So far, I've had our Ward Sunday School President (who's a friend, so that's not so nerve-wracking), the STAKE PRESIDENT (a little more nerve-wracking, though I know him and I know that he's not scary ... You make a joke about going onstage in your nudie-pants, and realize that the Stake Prez is in the room and HAD to have heard you ... and you apologize ... and he tells you that it's okay ... Yeah, one has to admit to oneself that he's not going to be shocked by anything else you do. So that's out of the way. Yay?), a friend who was visiting your ward for the day (I practically dragged her to class, so I happily brought that upon myself), the bishop, one of the members of the bishopric, ... and now the STAKE SUNAY SCHOOL PRESIDENT (who I didn't know at all).
So that was kind of ... nerve-wracking.
But he said that I did fine.
In fact, my Ward Sunday School Prez reported to me on Sunday that (1) he didn't have anyone lined up to observe my class (That's fine. I told him. Next week. It's tradition!) and (2) that Brother ___ was impressed with my teaching.

So, that's nice. Because Brother ____ sure didn't have to say that. ^_^
I guess it's a good thing that I brought a handout for the class. And that I printed up strips with the scriptures to read on them. And that I tell my students about great resources to help their scripture study. Because if there's one thing I love (besides the gospel, since I do love it bunches. And my family, ditto), it's books. Or knowledge available on the interwebz.

I know there's more to report about. but my hands are tired of typing. I'll do more later.
But sooner than a month from now.

Finally ponderizing

I know, it's been a month since General Conference ... but I'm finally doing the right stuff. Well, trying, anyways.

So, I chose  Doctrine and Covenants 6:36 for this week (even BEFORE the kerfuffle about the new Church policy change/clarification occurred).

Doctrine and Covenants 6:36 - "Look unto me in every thought; Doubt not. Fear not."

I will admit that one of the perks of choosing this verse is that it is SHORT. It's not THE shortest verse in the scriptures ... but it's bite-sized, for sure, in length.

And, with how this week has gone, it's been very helpful. Even though we see "through a glass darkly," and we don't understand all the reasonings behind every bit of doctrine and policy, we can know that we will understand it one day. The truth will come. We will understand.

So, we have two choices:

• Keep moving forward in faith - knowing that God loves ALL his children, but doesn't approve of all our choices; that He has given us loving leaders who hearken to His voice, for the benefit of the Church and the world; that obeying the commandments of God brings us safety and peace.
  
  OR
  
• We don't. We think that we know better than an omniscient, loving God ... or the leaders that have been called by the Lord. 

I feel for those whose hearts are conflicted. I feel for those who feel that this new policy is hard. I have compassion for them.

Truly, the main reason why I did not automatically meet the news of this announcement with joy was because I know there are those who would malign our leaders as making this policy change out of spite or bigotry. That people out there could think that we, as the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, aren't doing this out of love and compassion for those who struggle with the trial of same-sex attraction.

I have friends who identify as straight, lesbian, gay, or bisexual.
Does this mean that I love any of them more or less because of their sexual preference?
NO.

(The main reason I like and love people is because of what kind of person they are. I get that everyone is going to sin. Heck, I'm a sinner, too. We all will make different choices. Some will lead us closer to Heavenly Father. Others won't, they'll lead us further away from Him. ... If I decided to only have as friends people who kept the commandments ALL the time, I wouldn't have ANY friends here on earth. We're all in this together. It's our duty to help each other along. It's our duty to show love and compassion to each other. Even when we don't agree.)

Heck, I consider this the same kind of mostly-non-issue as having friends of other religions.
We all have different beliefs and understandings. Dude, even other Latter-day Saints in my WARD (church-speak for congregation) have vastly differing views.
I have friends that are LDS. I have friends that are Catholic. or Baptist. Or Methodist. . Or non-denominational Christian. And there some Christian sects that I haven't even named. I have friends that are atheists. Or agnostics. Or pagan. Or Wiccan. ... I don't know if I have any that are Jewish or Muslim or Hindu or Buddhist. But I look forward to making friends with them ... because the more that I can learn of their characters and their religions, the better of a person I will be. Not only because I'll have more factual knowledge, of course, but also because I'll be able to better understand THEM and their beliefs and the beauties of the tenants of their faiths.

Just like I appreciate when my friends of differing sexualities help me to learn about and understand them as people. I refuse to pigeon-hole them into their sexuality ... just as I hate to pigeon-hole any of my friends into their race.
It just sounds wrong and belittling to say "my black friend/my lesbian friend/my pagan friend/etc" as if that were the only thing about them.

No, I prefer to think and categorize my friends in better-nuanced ways (i.e., "my friend, L, who teaches theater and I've known since my freshman year of college and we would walk down the main drag of campus saying "little French" and "HORROR" back and forth and had cats named Lucifer and Angel and is hilarious and we joke that we're twins since our first and middle names are so similar and we had tons of fun in German class and she says some of the funniest things and she happens to be black." OR "My friend, H, who I met through blogging and a mutual online friend and she likes cats and she is a powerhouse at working out and she posts some of the most hilarious things on facebook which always makes me smile and laugh and she's just as hilarious when she texts and she wants to be a gangsteeeer when she grows up and I found her doormat for her online and she loved it and actually ordered it which made me feel useful and she's so down-to-earth and seems like the most fun mom/mom-friend ever and she happens to also be a lesbian." OR "My friend, D, who I crushed on my sophomore year of high school and he would insist on carrying my hugely, heavely backpack of doom and he made me the best ever mixed-tape which I still have and he used to have hair like Jareth from Labyrinth and he's very funny and he's a great dad to his girls and I once stabbed him in the leg with a pencil and it left a little scar and he's really forgiven me after I've begged for forgiveness but he loves to rub my nose in it and declares that he'll be telling the  horror story of the ALLANNA when he's in a nursing home to scare the other residents and their families and he's convinced his daughter that he IS Prince Jareth and my friend's daughter that he IS Deadpool and he happens to also be pagan. ... And he and I have some GREAT discussions about religion. He's very well-versed in a lot of mythology that I'm not so knowledgeable about  ... and there are other friends that I have like that.) Yes, there all have differences that I could pigeon-hole these people as, but I really believe that we're all more than just a sum of our parts.

So, love and compassion are what Jesus taught and what I want to emulate.
He also wasn't accepting of sin ... he was compassionate and empathetic to the sinner, of course! ... but, if sin wasn't a big deal, he would never have said, "Go and sin no more."

But he did.
He didn't say, "You do you."
He didn't shun those who sinned or tried to make them feel like crap.
He loved. He led. He showed us how to improve by His perfect example. He gave us a higher law to follow. And part of that was showing love and compassion while eschewing sins. He never promised that it would be easy or feel fair or be easy for us to understand.

So, my goal is to keep the commandments, to do my best to show Christ's love to everyone around me through how I treat them, and to doubt not and fear not.

And that's what I'm going to do my darndest to do.

Rambling Reaction (but not a heat-of-the-moment reaction ... more of a mule-this-over-for-a-bit reaction)

If you've been anywhere around social media during this last weekend, you've heard about the policy changes made by my church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints).

I just need to get a brain dump made ... because I have thoughts. And I deserve a place to write them down.

Before I really start, I want to make it clear that I have friends with many, diverse opinions and lifestyles. And I know that it's my Christian duty to love everyone, regardless of age/sex/orientation/lifestyle/race/religion/whatever. In fact, I consider it an honor and privilege to have the opportunity to have these people in my life (even when I don't always understand their choices). Because, heaven knows, I'm not at all perfect myself. (Seriously, if you think that I am ... well, you're very sweet. And deluded. But I appreciate it. Please be aware that I am SO. VERY. NOT. perfect. I'm a total screw-up. But I'm working at it. Even if I leave myself LOTS of room for improvement.)

Point #1 - God loves ALL His children.

And I said unto him: I know that he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things. (1 nephi 11:17) -- See also this pamphlet - God Loveth His Children

He loves us perfectly, eternally, never removing any of His love from us. Jesus loves us. Again, perfectly. He was willing to give His life for us, to suffer more than any mortal being could possibly bear ... because He LOVES us.
Because He loves YOU and ME, He'd have been willing to atone for just a single one of us.
And, through His Atonement, He KNOWS EXACTLY how we feel, how we suffer ... There is nothing we go through that He cannot understand from OUR viewpoint. (And, since, unlike us, He does have a perfect knowledge of things, He understands us better than we understand ourselves.)

I KNOW that God loves ALL His children. ALL of them. EVERY SINGLE ONE.
When we make bad decisions, when we sin, He STILL loves us with a perfect love.
He is steadfast. He does not change.
We are the ones who, through our actions, either remove ourselves from Him or approach Him.

Still, there is NOTHING that we can ever do that would cause Him not to love us. Nothing.
His love is constant and unwavering. Because He is unchangeable. He is eternal.

Point #2 - We are not our temptations. Being tempted is not the same as sinning.
Think about it ... if Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the only perfect being to live on this earth ... if HE was tempted, why shouldn't we -- imperfect as we are -- suffer temptations as well?

Just because someone is tempted or has a proclivity towards a certain behavior that is not in keeping with the gospel, that doesn't mean that s/he is, inherently, a bad person.
If that were true, I'd be completely irredeemable (If I were my main sins, I'd be a gluttonous, slothful, vain, proud lazeabout. These attributes are things I need to work [VERY HARD] to overcome. I'm a work in progress. ... And, for the record, those are NOT my only sins. I've got quite the laundry list to choose from. That's why we have repentance. That's why we have the gospel ...).

We all have moral agency. We have the freedom to choose for ourselves -- to ACT, rather than be acted upon. When we are faced with temptations, we will always have a choice. And, our loving Heavenly Father will always provide a safe way for us to withstand it. If we choose to look for and follow it.

There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

And, knowing that we are not perfect, He provided a Savior, Jesus Christ, to come to earth -- to teach us, to atone for us, to die for us -- so that we are able to overcome physical death (through the resurrection) and spiritual death (our separation from God's presence -- through repentance).
Jesus was willing. He chose to come to earth and to atone for us, as a sinless sacrifice, and to die for us.

As it says in one of our hymns (#193 - I Stand All Amazed),

"I marvel that He would descend from His throne divine to rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine, that He would extend His great love unto such as I, sufficient to own, to redeem, and to justify. Oh, it is wonderful that he should care for me enough to die for me! Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!"

Truly, it is beyond description ... He loves us so very, very much. And, whenever I think of this ... I don't have the words to state how awed, how grateful I am ... because it is not possible to comprehend that amount of love and compassion.

And Jesus Christ was willing to suffer for ALL our sins. Because He loves us. Because He wants us to ALL be able to return to His/our Father's presence. Because He considers US worthy of such pain, suffering, and sacrifice. EACH OF US. INDIVIDUAL. EVERY SINGLE ONE.

Point #3 - God loves us. He wants us to be able to return to His presence. So, not only did He send His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to atone and die for us; He also sends us, from the beginning of time, prophets to help guide us. Our prophets give revelation to the whole Church and the whole world.

"Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets." - Amos 3:7

Because God loves us, we have prophets and other leaders to help guide us, to teach us what we need to know, so we can progress and grow and develop those attributes and character that will help us to become more like our Heavenly Parents.

When we choose to be obedient, to make those sacrifices in our lives so that we can become more like our Heavenly Father, full of love, light, and knowledge, ... well, it's rather obvious that we draw closer to Him. And, by following the commandments that He gives us, through his prophets (both ancient [Moses, Abraham, Jesus, etc] AND modern [Joseph Smith, Jr., continuing through our living prophet today, Thomas S. Monson ... and whoever follows him], we are blessed.

Obedience is founded upon faith. And we are not to follow our leaders blindly ... we, in fact, are COMMANDED (though these same leaders) to seek for personal confirmation, from the Holy Spirit, through personal prayer and scripture study.

But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.

 But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; therefore, you cannot write that which is sacred save it be given you from me. (Doctrine and Covenants 9:8-9)

I know that when I follow the counsel of our prophet and the apostles, I am blessed. I KNOW this, because I've seen it happen over and over again in my life. I also see that when I make choices contrary to the commandments, I lose the presence of the Holy Spirit and his constant guidance.
Life is (overall) easier when I choose to follow the revelations given to us from God through his prophets.

So you'll understand my sadness over the reactions to the changes in Church policy ... and, truly, they aren't really changes ... CLARIFICATIONS is a better word for this.

The more that I think on this, the more that it is confirmed to me that this clarification of Church policy is for the GOOD of these sweet souls. It is to protect the family, ALL FAMILIES, from contention.

This will help children, especially young children, not to have to deal with very adult/advanced issues of reconciling the fact that their parents are living a life that is contrary to the gospel and eternal progression. (Bear with me on that. I'll explain. Pinkie-swears!) It will allow these children every blessing they have been promised ... it's just delayed.

And, yes, it's quite sad that these sweet souls will have to wait. However, it's just a small matter of time. And they WILL be able to receive those blessings.

And ye cannot bear all things now; nevertheless, be of good cheer, for I will lead you along. The kingdom is yours and the blessings thereof are yours, and the riches of eternity are yours. 

And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more. (Doctrine and Covenants 78:18-19)

The Lord is aware of you. The Lord is aware of them. He will hold nothing back from them.
Rather like it's said in The Princess Bride, this policy cannot (indeed, does not) stop these individuals from receiving their promised blessings, it just postpones the delivery for a while.

We will face opposition in this life. Satan is striving to make it hard to tell what is good from what is not. And, I think in this case, he's working overtime.

So, back to the point that I promised to elucidate on ... The plan of salvation, or the plan of happiness. It has both names for a very good reason. Because if we follow the plan, we achieve both those results.

from http://courtneyaitken.blogspot.com/2013/01/plan-of-salvation-bookmarks.html

 Here's the plan of salvation, made simple (if you want to read more about it, follow the link in the caption. Courtney Aitken also has a backside for the bookmark FILLED with scriptural references.
You could also ask me. Or another LDS friend that you have. Or the missionaries. Or go to LDS.org and read about it there ... there's lots of options.

• Before we were born, we all existed as spirit children of our Heavenly Parents.
  Heavenly Father presented a beautiful plan to us -- one that would allow us to learn, grow, become more like Him, and return to His presence.
  To do this, we would be born in mortal bodies, on earth. We would have the opportunity to learn the commandments, prove ourselves by making good (or poor) choices, and make covenants with Him. 
• We would have need of a savior, knowing that we would make mistakes and sin.
  Jesus and Lucifer both offered to be that savior.
  Lucifer promised to return EVERY soul to Heavenly Father (which would require negating agency), if he received all the glory.
  Jesus offered to go, allowing us to have our own agency to choose for ourselves, and the glory would go to Heavenly Father (which is fair, since it was His plan, in the first place).
• Some spirits followed Lucifer and they were cast out -- Lucifer became Satan. Those other souls that followed him were not able to come to earth and get bodies. This is why they are damned -- they made it impossible for themselves to progress (just like a dam stops the flow of water in a river. At least, for the most part. But you get where I'm going with that analogy, right?)
• Jesus created this world for us. It is a beautiful place.
• Adam and Eve came here and were placed in the Garden of Eden. They, as we, were made to forget our pre-mortal existence. If we all remembered everything that we knew then, this life wouldn't be a true testing opportunity (and, as it is, what with the scriptures and prophetic counsel and personal revelation, it's quite an open-book test). They were tempted and chose to eat the fruit of knowledge of good and evil. This allowed them to become mortal, which enabled them to fulfill the first commandment of "multiply and replenish the earth."
  Also, just for what it's worth, we honor Eve as being very brave and selfless in this decision. Yes, it was a transgression ... but it was for a noble purpose. And Adam, as our first prophet, is quite worthy of admiration, too.
• Because of this, "The Fall," as we call it, where Adam and Eve were removed from God's presence (by having to leave the Garden of Eden), which is a spiritual death AND being made mortal (so they would die), we all had need of a savior. (Which we discussed a bit earlier).
• From the beginning of time, we have been blessed with prophets to help guide us. The Lord gives revelations to the prophets that apply to the whole world and the whole church. He loves us and wants to give us every opportunity to return to Him.
• Jesus came, in the meridian of time, to live here on earth, teach, serve, atone and die for us. Because of His sacrifices for us, we are able to repent (thus overcoming that spiritual death) and be resurrected (overcoming physical death).
• After we die, we will go to the spirit world, since our bodies and spirits will be separated (that's what death is). Those who did not have the opportunity to make covenants (baptism, receiving one's endowment, eternal marriage, etc), will have the opportunity to receive them through vicarious work done on earth (These covenants require a body to do them, you see. That's why our church is gung-ho about temple work, since the temple is the only place we can perform this service for those who've passed on). We all will be able to learn more and make some (slower) progress here in the spirit world.
• We will be resurrected. Our bodies will be immortal bodies, made perfect. (That isn't to say that we'll all be supermodels or bodybuilders ... but we'll have bodies that work perfectly, for sure.)
• After the resurrection, there will be a final judgement. We'll be judged for our choices (Now, if we've repented, God won't remember those sins. Neither will we). If we're worthy, we will be comfortable and confident in His presence. He will be able to welcome us into His presence.
  If we aren't worthy of his presences, we will go to a lesser kingdom. The Telestial Kingdom is the lowest. It's, pretty much, what we're dealing with here. The Holy Ghost can be here to teach and instruct.
  The Terrestrial Kingdom is better. You have to live a higher law than what's required for the Telestial Kingdom. Jesus will come to minister.
  If you want to receive all the blessings promised, then work to be Celestial Kingdom material. We will be in God's presence. We will be able to be with our eternal families. We will have the ability to progress and reach our overall goal of becoming like our Heavenly Parents.
  To qualify for the Celestial Kingdom, we need a few things:

1. Faith in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior
2. Repentance (We show remorse, make restitution, and work to change our character to overcome these sins that are keeping us from our eternal goals)
3. Baptism by immersion by the proper authority
4. Receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost (to, if we are worthy, be our constant companion as a comforter and guide) 
5. Enduring to the end by following the commandments and keeping the covenants that we make with our Heavenly Father

Yes, it is a trifle difficult to explain it all in one nutshell ... but, of everything in this world, it's the one constant that makes sense (at least to me. Per the 11th Article of Faith, you're free to believe and worship as you see fit. You have the moral agency to do so. We respect that).

But, okay, so we're working to be like Heavenly Father -- He is perfect, has an immortal body, is all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-loving. Pretty awesome goal, right?

Another blessing that we can receive in this journey to become more like him is to have family bonds that are not ended with our deaths (e.g., "til death do you part.").
Through the power of the Melchizedek priesthood, we are able to be sealed to our families with an eternal bond. A husband and wife can be sealed together. Their children can be sealed to them. (If a husband and wife are sealed before their children are born, those children are born in the covenant, already sealed to their parents).
If we keep those covenants that we've made in the temple, we can be together forever as families.

That's the big reason for the Church's support of moral issues, like marriage between one man and one woman.
It's not because we don't love these other people. We do. We're commanded to. And, if we're being Christlike (like we SHOULD be), we WANT to love them ... and to make sure that they know that they're loved, valued, and cherished by our Heavenly parents.

Sadly, we don't know WHY same-sex attraction is given as a trial for some people.
I do know, though, that they are strong, worthy individuals who are capable of withstanding this temptation ... as we are all capable of withstanding being tempted ... through the power of Jesus Christ.
And if they, like we all do sometimes, fold? They are able to repent. Just like the rest of us.
If they choose to enter into a same-sex marriage, that is their choice. However, that marriage cannot be sealed through the Holy Spirit of Promise. It will end with their death ... and I find it terribly sad that they'd put so much time, effort, emotion, and energy into something that cannot be eternal.

Sometimes, our own choices affect more people than just ourselves.
Sometimes, due to our choices, other people will suffer.
This is yet another reason for the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
Through the Atonement, ALL wrongs will be made right. All sins will be forgiven. All hurts -- physical, spiritual, and emotional -- will be healed.
Oh, it is wonderful to me.

Will Heavenly Father hold back any blessing from them, if they actively seek those blessings?
No.
Because He LOVES us all.

And, knowing that Heavenly Father loves us, would he send us leaders who would lead the Church to withhold blessings and opportunities due to hate or bigotry?
NO.
So I KNOW that there are reasons of love behind this.
Because I KNOW that our prophet and apostles and all our other leaders are working to emulate Christ and His love for all God's children.

Just like how, because I love my children, I'm not going to condone them doing things that will hurt them.
I gave my kids the example of, "What if we bought a motorcycle? Are you allowed to ride it by yourself?"
"No."
"What if you did ride it by yourself? What would happen?"
"We'd get in trouble."
"Would it make sense for us to get rid of the motorcycle ... especially while you weren't allowed to ride it by yourself?"
"Yes."
"Would that be because we're being mean?"
"Well ... no, not really."
"Then why would we take it away?"
"So that we couldn't get in trouble."
"Exactly."

Just like how, when an individual is excommunicated from the Church, it's NOT because the leaders are wanting to be mean ... it's to allow the person to either continue the problematic choices without being under greater condemnation from the Lord for breaking (and continuing to break) covenants -OR- to allow the person to repent while protecting himself/herself from bigger punishments.

Does that sound like it's something done out of hate? Or a plan from a loving Heavenly Father through loving leaders?

To me, it's definitely the second. Because, even when a person is excommunicated or disfellowshipped, we have every hope and desire for them to return. We love and watch and wait. If they CHOOSE to repent and return, we rejoice. If they don't, we just love them while maintaining our standards and not condoning their actions.
Because we are all worthy of love.

Because Heavenly Father loves us all.

And because I KNOW that He loves us, I know that He would never do something just for the sole reason of hurting people. He will ask hard things of us, just like our earthly parents ask us to do things we'd rather not do (take out the trash/clean our rooms/etc) -- like we ask our kids to do ... because we know that it's (1) important for them to learn and/or (2) it's to help them develop into something better than they were.

I also know that, if ever it should occur that a prophet were to cause God's church to be led astray, He would TAKE THAT PROPHET OUT. And, there's the fact that this matter was discussed and agreed upon unanimously among 15 apostles and prophets. Do you know HOW HARD it is for even similar-minded people to agree completely? ...

Yes, my heart hurts for those who find this news hard to bear. I wish I had a way to make it so that they automatically felt loved and supported enough to wade through any doubts.

Still, regardless of this sorrow, I will not support those who try to tell me that this is an evil move, that our leaders are uninspired ... because everything points to the contrary.

The Family Proclamation was delivered just over 20 year ago. It is Church doctrine. It has not and will not change.

That doesn't mean that we are not under commandment to love everyone. Because we ARE.
But, if we choose to be politically-correct to the point where we eschew the teachings of God, given through His servants, we are putting ourselves (and those we influence) in danger.

So, TL;DR:

• The commandment to love everyone still stands. 
• We don't have to agree on everyone's actions. 
• I choose to support President Thomas S. Monson, our prophet, and the other God-appointed leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, as I have raised my arm to show my support. It makes me most sad when I hear/read others maligning our leaders for not bowing down to the demands of the world/being politically correct ... as if they really had a choice to do otherwise.
• I do not understand all things. But I will keep my covenants, because they are precious to me.
  I have too much to lose, otherwise. I treasure the fact that my family can be together forever.
• I wish that I could ensure that all God's children, my spirit brothers and sisters, received those blessings that come from making and keeping covenants with the Lord. Because they bring more than happiness -- they bring JOY. In this life and in the life to come. 
• And I want the best for you all. Because I do love you.
• If you desire those blessings, they CAN be yours, too. They may be delayed, but never denied. And you will be blessed for your patience. Because our Heavenly Father loves you.
  And it WILL be worth every struggle. 

If you have questions or if I need to better explain things in the rambling, oh-so-very-long post, please let me know.

MOAR crazy Dream Chronicles! Lucky you!

Yeah, I'm only remembering bits and pieces of my dreams ... but they're sure ... special.

The other night, in my dream, I started out with Bubbles and I driving around a college campus (could have been my alma mater, but it was MUCH larger). And they'd moved the mailboxes OUTSIDE the building. And I had a key that fit ... so I was all, "Hey, I could always have stuff shipped here and pick it up for free!" (Must have been a holdover from reading Ready Player One with Michael.)

THEN, the other part of my dream had me as, like, idk, an adjunct professor ... but I had finished up my term, so I was going to be leaving.
And the building we were in was haunted. By this TALL, strapping, red-headed Viking of a ghost. And he got one of the other professors to jump off the building (her red tartan-print dressed, broken body was still on the pavement below). And I was leaving the building and he took this goodbye-present handleless mug of mine and BROKE it. (Not that it was a huge deal. Since we have a BAZILLION mugs [who doesn't?] AND it wasn't my style anyways.) But I was irked by the PRINCIPLE of the thing. Ill-mannered, murdering ghost.

LAST night's dream was ... odd ... because, OF COURSE it was.

So, here's the deal. IRL, I have written a skit for my son's Cub Scout group. And, since last meeting was passing out flyers for a food drive (they ended up collecting over 100lbs of food!), there was NOT time to even have the boys read the script.

SO, TOMORROW, his den is meeting early so I can (1) pass out scripts, (2) assign roles, (3) have the boys run through it a couple times, and (4) go soak my head.
Mostly kidding on that last one. But I haven't had much practice directing things. I usually just act or sing. Or help with props/makeup/costuming (but not so much on that LAST one in THAT list).

I'm just hoping that it'll go well and that we'll HAVE five boys to play all the parts ... if not, well, It could end up being a Bruise production with starring roles from his Scout leaders, parents, and twin sister. We'll see ... But, apparently, I'm a little worried about the whole thing ...

So, in my dream, one of our past sister missionaries was throwing a huge dramatic spectacle. And, last minute, I was given a script. I didn't have my lines down at all ... and I hadn't really even had time to read over my part(s). And there was some serious swear words ... so I'm taking liberties and editing them out ... because (1) swearing is something that I've worked VERY HARD to not do nearly so much (Srsly, y'all -- my sophomore year of high school, I was SUCH a potty-mouth. Sailors and truckers would have blanched. So my use of "craps," "damns," and "hells" is a TOTAL improvement. Just so you know.) and (2) IT WAS AT CHURCH. You can't say scatalogical terms of THAT kind at church. Because that's Jesus's house.

And then, the other scene I was in, I dropped my script and LOST MY PLACE and couldn't find it ... and so I was having to make up lyrics to some rock song that I'd only caught a wee glimpse of ... so I'm writhing on the floor, turning in horizontal circles on my back, mic in hand, as I try to channel Freddie Mercury at his glammest and maybe a soupçon of Stevie Nicks, as I'm MAKING UP LYRICS and hoping that the returned sister missionary won't be too put out that I'm ruining her script.

Okay, so I can get that maybe that rock-star element of my dream is because on Facebook folks were complimenting my Jem! costume from around six years ago. My wig and makeup were awesome, if I do say so myself ... the rest of the costume could have gone better.
If I make it again, I know a lot of things to improve.
But it's not going to be this year, since there's only a few days until Halloween. And I don't have a costume at all. *sigh* I don't even know what to attempt to dress as.

In other non-dream-related news, I've passed sixth-grade math on Khan Academy. I did a load of dishes. We had soup for dinner last night. We went to the library's Halloween shindig (and ran into Michael's cousin and his family there ^_^). And I sent a Facebook message to the (ex?) friend who had unfriended me.
I let her know that I noticed we weren't Facebook friends anymore. And that I understood that it could be a glitch (not terribly likely) or that it could have not. But that I wished the best for her, even if that meant that I wasn't friends with her anymore. And that if there had been anything that I had done or said that had hurt or offended her, that it wasn't done purposefully ... and that I was sorry if I had hurt or offended her.

As my mom said, either she'll respond to it or not. And, if she writes back, there's an answer. If she doesn't, there's another answer.

The ball is in her court. And that's ... a little ... nerve-wracking. But, well, it felt insincere to pretend that I didn't notice the change in our friendship. I get that people grow apart ... but, well, when you've been really tight friends, it seems more direct to let the other person know that you're choosing to unfriend them. It'd be kind to let them know why ... even a "we've grown apart" or something.
I've unfriended some folks on facebook ... but they were (pretty much) strangers who we had friended each other for facebook games that I wasn't playing anymore. That's a bit different, right?

I've almost got Bruise's shirt done for Halloween. It's the main part of his costume (the rest is a certain pair of jeans (I should make sure those are in the wash) and trainers). I should make a clasp for Bucket's cloak. Bubbles's costume is all storebought ... and, well, we did pick up about the perfect pair of Crocs for her to wear with it (SPARKLY TEAL, Y'ALL. TEAL. AND SPARKLES. Can you tell that I'm a little jealous?), so her's is all taken care of.

So, yeah. I should check on Bruise's shirt ... do the last bits of paint on it. Get a shower. Do more laundry. Drink a buttload of water (doing this week-long water challenge. Michael's doing it, too. We're only drinking water as our beverage this week. And we're SUPPOSED to be drinking (bodyweight/2) in ounces. ... This is the third day in ... and man I suck at drinking enough water. Sunday, got nearly 3/4 of the suggested amount. Yesterday, I didn't even get one-third. *sigh*).

And I'm working at getting through library books ... physical AND online (Overdrive is a great app. you can use it to read books [e-books or audiobooks] on your phone or tablet, borrowed through your library ... well, if your library is part of it. Or, you could do the free ones that are available to everyone and don't count against how many books you can check out. You're limited to six holds at a time ... and TWO hold came in within a day of each other. And you only get them for 14 days. *sigh* I mean, you can check them out again, if there's not a hold on them, of course .....)

But, yeah. Busy girl.
Who also needs to read her scriptures and plan her lesson (which HOPEFULLY won't be observed by the STAKE PRESIDENT next week. Don't get me wrong, I love our Stake President ... but, well, that's a little stressful to be observed. Especially when I COULD AND SHOULD have been a bit better prepared ... and, bless them, but my class was VERY excitable. So it was interesting making sure that we focused and refocused their attention on the topic of showing Christlike love to others. But I was able to tell them about how the Young Women Theme, this month's Relief Society lesson, and the overall goal of "The Power of Everyday Missionaries" all integrate that theme ... and they had some great insights. And we discussed sharing our beliefs with others and HOW to do it best and HOW to show others, through our actions and words, how much Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ love them ... and President C did say that I did a great job, so it was a good lesson ... but a little stressful. ^_^) ... among another billion things that I should get done.

The Talk ... well, not THAT one, really ... that's an ongoing process.

Yesterday, after sending the kids to bed, Bucket came out and asked if we could talk.

"Sure, sweetie."

"In your room."

"Okay. Sure."

(I do love my children more than catching up on the last season of The Walking Dead.)

So, we sat on my bed and she started crying.

It turns out that, for a few months, she'd been keeping something to herself.

A few days ago, we'd watched this video together


And, I've talked with them about seeing things that make them feel uncomfortable.
(We do have a copy of Good Pictures, Bad Pictures by Kristen Jenson, which is a helpful resource, too).

Bucket told me that one of her friends, when they play barbies, has the dolls simulate intercourse.
And it made her uncomfortable. And she hadn't wanted to say anything.
I was a little surprised by which friend she named.

First, I thanked Bucket for coming and talking to me.
She confided that she had said a prayer to help her have the courage to talk about her discomfort, and I commended her for choosing to turn to Heavenly Father about it.

I did tell her that it's a rather normal thing that will happen when playing barbies (Hey, my plots with my dolls had a few soap-operatic encounters ... but I was happier playing with a more fairy-tale-esque theme as the main plot. I had a barbie that was the REAL PRINCESS and her beau [Mr. Heart, actually, since he was handsomer] could SEE that, regardless of her shoddy dress, she was worthwhile and precious ... as opposed to the Mean-Girl, GORGEOUS barbie in her FABULOUS gown, who sported an awful snobby attitude ... but the kind barbie was good with all the children and animals and other people ... and, being a prince, he looked through the fancy facade and saw who really deserved his heart ... YES, I KNOW. But it was a FUN plot to play with, okay? Don't even ask about the storylines for my My Little Ponies. ... And my Precious Places figurines would play along to the highlights of  Les Miserables ... Yeah, I was a weird kid.)

And I did tell her that I can't change the past (though the power of Christ's Atonement can help to heal everything), but that we could make plans for when things like this happen in the future.

She determined that, if it ever happens again, she can speak up and state that she's feeling uncomfortable ... and ask to change something (go play with LEGO/utilize a different storyline -- maybe Ken and Barbie are going on a beach trip instead of canoodling) ... but she felt better (more empowered, I think) and better able to deal with things like this in the future.

I did, also, let Michael know about what she and I discussed. As her father, he should be aware of what's going on in her life ... and it wasn't anything horribly private/embarrassing.

Though, I do know that Michael is glad he's married to me, who doesn't have a problem talking about sexuality or intimacy with my kids. Hey, it's a fact of life that we have these feelings ... we have them for a reason. (Boyd K. Packer would tell you that, too. And he is an awesome [now late] apostle).
My mom was very open to answering my questions. And, like her, I'd much prefer that my kids come to me with their questions instead of turning to their friends or (worse, often) the internet.

I do let Bruise and Bucket (and eventually Bubbles) know that we believe that Heavenly Father has a strict moral code. And that obedience to it does protect us. That we believe that sexual intercourse is sacred (though it can also be, dare I say it, fun).
I also let them know that, even if they choose not to obey this moral code, they will still have the fullness of Heavenly Father's and Jesus's love for them (though they will lose the companionship of the Holy Ghost ... and distance themselves from Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, until they repent, anyways) ... and that we (Michael and I) will still love them. We'll be disappointed, of course, but we acknowledge that they have their own moral agency and have the right to make their own choices ... though they will have to accept the consequences for those choices. (And, truly, I'd PREFER that they make correct choices and have those happy consequences ... but I get that it's not my life and all that).

I also have let them know that if anyone should disrespect their agency (Heaven forbid that they [or anyone they know. Or anyone they don't know. Or ANYONE] are sexually abused/raped), that they can ALWAYS come to us for love and support. We will do everything that we can to help them. And that, since it wasn't THEIR choice, it's not their sin at all. (And, the Atonement isn't just for sin. It's for EVERYTHING that needs to be made right ... and, through the Atonement, they can be healed body, spirit, mind ... all of that.)

So, yeah. That's a heavier topic than I really wanted to cover with my children ... But it's one that I know I'm going to have to cover multiple times. Like I said, "THE TALK" isn't just a once-and-you're-done type of thing.

*sigh* But it's a good thing, making sure that MAH BAYBEES are prepared for the real world. I mean, that's my main goal as a parent -- to raise (eventual) adults who will be good, self-sufficient citizens, who will be able to make their own choices with confidence, who will have their own testimonies, who will be a source of light and goodness in the world, who will be able to dispel fear and hate and replace it with love and kindness, since the world SURE NEEDS that.

Though, if our children can take care of us in our old age in the manner to which we'd like to be accustomed, though, I wouldn't argue. ;P

Crazy Dream Chronicles - Part Uchtdorf

So, last night, I dreamed and woke up with a recollection of it (from the bags under my eyes, you wouldn't be that well-rested, but there you go).

In my dream, there was something going on in my hometown area (maybe for high school or church).

And my mom had taken my Roxy-Sis out for something ... she and I were scheduled to meet up later.

AND our friend, Mer, was there, so I was giving her a ride (like I'll be doing later this month).

I had a container of makeup and stuff on my desk where she appeared (Not anything like my IRL desk. There's not any ROOM for makeup there, since it's buried in books, papers, and office supplies).
I was going to give her this awesome (wish I had it IRL) pearlescent (creamy green to purple), GLOW-IN-THE-DARK liquid eyeliner.
But she had this special mascara or eyelash treatment, so she couldn't wear it. And I felt bad for offering her something she couldn't use.

On our way to meet Roxy, we were driving on a stretch of road and I pulled into a field to park, not realizing that I HAD pulled into a field.
It was a field that (somehow) was next door to my extended family's property (My great-aunt and her daughters' place), so we started the car again, and I yelled a "hello" (since we were in a hurry) to family members who were visible from the front (eldest cousin [well, first-cousin-once-removed],  then my step-aunt's granddaughter and youngest grandson).

Then we pulled into the old Stake Center in Douglas County for my church (the place where I happened to be baptized, by the by, though that doesn't pertain to this story) ... and there was a meeting there.

In one room, as we walked through, I caught sight of President Dieter F. Uchtdorf (the second counselor in our church First Presidency ... so, in short, the third in rank of Church hierarchy), who left off talking with the group that he was with and made his way over to shake my hand.

He asked me how I was doing and about life.
I was a little star struck ... I usually don't get to talk with famous people (at least not without a LOT of planning and some monetary means -- like when Michael got us tickets to see Neil Gaiman, who's also such a lovely, polite person).

And President Uchtdorf wished me a (belated) happy Mother's Day and asked, "Sister [C], how's your calling going?"

(If you're not fluent in Latter-day Saint Church-speak, your calling is the responsibility that you've been extended [and accepted] in your ward/stake/area/etc. You don't get paid for it. My current calling is teaching the Sunday School class for the 12- and 13-year-olds [or that were 12 or 13 at the beginning of the calendar year, I should say]. My most-recent past calling was Nursery Leader. Michael's current calling [for what feels like FOREVER, but is really, what, six years, I think] is Elders' Quorum President. Our leaders, even our Prophet, Thomas S. Monson, and the apostles and area authorities are all called by God. And, yes, we CAN refuse a calling. It's our choice. Though it is recommended to accept, knowing that the Lord will strengthen and qualify you to the work ... If you have questions, just hit me a comment. I can explain more. ^_^ Clear as mud, right?)

And I started gushing (briefly, since I know that President Uchtdorf is a busy man and has lots of responsibilities) that I loved my calling ... which I do. I have a great class of young adults who make teaching really fun ... even if we barely touch on the recommended topic for that class. But I have the Ward's Sunday School President's okay for that. The main goal in the new "manual" (it's all online, really) is to help the Youth to understand the doctrines and be strengthened/ready to face the world. It's a BIG goal, but it's a good one.

But ... and I realized this more after I woke up ... President Uchtdorf KNEW who I was. He called me by name.

Which puts me in mind (especially after I've fallen out of habit [AGAIN] of daily scripture reading and prayer) that our Heavenly Father KNOWS who I am. He KNOWS my name.
Heck, he KNOWS me better than I know myself.

And that's humbling.

Still, as awesome and dear as President Uchtdorf is, HIS knowing my name is a little scary.
Since that could end up in a huge calling for Michael (or me) where we'd have to move to UTAH.
(Nothing bad about Utah, really. Besides the lack of green and that my family's almost ALL here in Oregon ... But I'm sure that it'd be lots easier to get a Caffeine-free Cherry Coke there ...)

But, yeah ... that's my takeaway from the dream. So far, anyways.

Mom's coming up today.

I have half the dishes done.
I'm sporting a 98% mastery of 5th grade math (yes!) on Khan Academy
I'm halfway up to getting caught up on scriptures.
I did Duolingo.
Still need to do Rosetta Stone; that'll be later.
I worked on Typing.com ... mostly so that I can run my kids' noses in HOW AWESOME THEIR MOM IS, WHAT?!??

Tomorrow, I'll have a meeting with the kids' teachers about what wasn't discussed at Curriculum Night (a lot ... because we only had 45 minutes scheduled. Yeah. Not the teachers' fault at all. And, well, as an Ed major and daughter of a teacher, I have lots of questions. And I made sure to let them know that I AM on their team and willing to help out with anything that I can!) ... then a few hours (where I'll clean the house and prepare Sunday School lessons and stuff) until I donate blood.
Then the big kids will get home. And there's a fundraiser for their school at a local eatery. AND it's the Strings program's kick-off (Go to the school, get instruments and music books, etc) ... and by then, it'll be time for bed.

Just in time to get up, get everyone dressed, do a quick devotional, run Bubbles to Grandma's house, run the kids to school, and volunteer for School Picture Day. *sigh*
It'll be good ... it's just a LOT of walking and crowd control.

But Michael will pick up Bubbles after work, so I won't have to run into the next town TWICE. Then, it'll be time for grocery shopping and cleaning the house a little more, making sure that we're prepared for General Conference (making cinnamon rolls, maybe?) ... then it'll be time for a good weekend.

Conference, doing part of the annual fire department scavenger hunt between sessions, more conference, ... we're going to try and take some cookies to a (less-active) friend's house (I don't know if HE knows that he's our friend ... but he will now, won't he? Mwhahaha), Michael will go to Priesthood session at the Stake Center (so he can actually pay attention) ... I'm considering having the kids watch it with me at home (yay streaming!) ... then Sunday will have the last two sessions of Conference. And I'll be more ready to study this conference than I have been before.
(This year, I did a 40-day challenge before Conference, where I read a talk a day (more or less) so that I am now more familiar with what was discussed and what I should know.
I also took my copy of the Ensign to Staples and had them laminate the front and back covers and spiral-bound the whole thing. It's such a great idea. As soon as November's Ensign comes out, you know what I'll be doing. And investing in more highlighters ... I had four highlighters, so I used them. Orange was quotes/stories, pink was suggestions/counsel, blue was blessings promised, and yellow was ... everything else. I really could have used at least one more color ... but I worked with what I had at the ready.)

I should go put on my face since I have a Visiting Teaching appointment to go to in a bit.
Don't want to scare anyone, ha ha ha.

Heinz Brand Catch-Up (j/k)

Okay, what have I been up to?

About 5'5" ... same since sixth grade. Har har har ...

But, really, let's see ...

Friday, was a little busy ... Michael got home from work after Bubbles and I were trying to get the house a wee bit cleaner (limited success, though). We finally watched "Home" so we could return it to his cousin. (Very cute. And not just because I think Jim Parsons is funny.)
Then we made sure that our temple clothing fit (and, no, my skirt didn't. I need to lose some inches for sure to get it to fit well).

We picked Bruise and Bucket up from school and took all the kids to Grandma's house (to spend the night. FREEEEEEDOM! Don't get me wrong, I love our kids. But it's nice to have a date-date without any children around) and headed up to Portland.

We stopped by Deseret Book. I got a new temple skirt (elastic waistband, so it's a little more forgiving) and I also picked up a copy of the Teaching, No Greater Call manual, since it's often referred to in the lesson outlines for my Sunday School class. We also saw on a crazy-good sale (nearly 75% off) a book that's by an author that we like (and his wife).
(Sure enough, I was able to find what I was searching for in the hardcopy manual ... so I can be better prepared for my lessons.)

We didn't end up needing to bring our temple clothes, since we opted to do Initiatories for the family names that I had in my bag (What? You don't print out family records, have the baptisms and confirmations done, then carry the uncompleted cards in your purse for a year? *bad great-granddaughter/great-niece*) ... I now have the Initiatories completed for two of my great-grandmothers (both of whom I actually met. One, Betty, died when I was four, but I remember her a little. The other one, Alma, I met the summer before my freshman year of high school ... It was due to that visit that I have a soft spot for reading the World Weekly News. :D). Michael had three names (great-grandfathers and my Nana's brother). I also did five names that aren't from my family ... they were all Hungarian and some of the ladies in the records were nearly 300 years old.

After the temple, Michael and I went to Outback Steakhouse (first time -- he had a gift card). It was good (especially the Coco-berry smoothie). We also tried the Bloomin' Onion. He had a sandwich and I had tacos. Everything was really tasty ... spendy, but good. I couldn't finish what I had ordered, so we had leftovers. LOTS of leftovers.

Saturday, we didn't sleep in ... we grabbed a voucher for Free Museum Day and headed up to the Evergreen Aviation and Space Museum. Michael had never been ... and it was a good time to go, since we could get in for free. It's a lot different going there without kids (you actually have time to read the signs, OH. MY. GOSH.) and I was able to lead him around a bit. We looked at nearly everything ... though it took us nearly four hours.

Then we stopped by The Pita Pit (our favorite) on the way to pick up the kids.
After we got home, I was tired and COMPLETELY FORGOT about the General Women's Conference broadcast. Whoops!

However, while Bruise and Michael ran to Target and the grocery store, Bucket and I cleaned out the kitchen fridge. Ew.

Sunday was mostly good. We had church. I taught my second lesson in my Sunday School class ... and was observed by the Ward Sunday School President (no pressure, right?) ... I emailed him later "So ... how'd I do?"

He responded, "How do you THINK you did?" (Can you tell that we're friends?)

I typed back, "Well, if you're judging success on how well we stuck to the lesson outline, abysmal.
"But, the students were participating and asking thoughtful questions ... It felt pretty good."

And he the told me that, yes, EVERYONE was participating (even one student who often doesn't) and that he agreed that it went well. Phew!

After we got home from church, I put on the YouTube feed of the Women's Conference session and took my notes on that. Bucket was ... a bit surly. I'm chalking it up to the fact that the kids and their cousins were up until 11 on Friday night. Because of that, and the fact that Bubbles was SHOUTING due to not wanting to fall asleep, we sent the kids to bed a little early ... where they all climbed into ONE bunk and Bruise ended up getting hit in the face by Bubbles, which caused him to bite his lip and there was BLOOD ... and Michael took care of that because I was on the phone with my mom.

(I'm so helpful. As Michael is steering Bruise to the bathroom, I call after them, "Put a drop of Helichrysum on it. It'll help with the bleeding," and assure my mom that, no, she doesn't need to hang up, Michael's got this, it's all cool.)

Michael and I are now four episodes into Gotham.

Jumping back, Michael took the kids to a baptism (Michael had been asked to give a talk at it) ... Bucket, though grumpy, opted to go Visiting Teaching with me. We met my VT companion there and we chatted while waiting (and waiting) for the sister we'd come to teach. She'd forgotten that we were coming (again ... After last month, where we waited for around 15-ish minutes, I thought that I'd cover my bases by texting her this morning. Apparently, I need to text right after church. Ha ha). she did come home ... 45 minutes later, but that was fine. K and I got to talk books in the meantime, so that was fine.

Bucket, though, had snitched my tablet out of my purse without asking, even though she had brought a book, so I wasn't thrilled about that. I instructed her that she SHOULD ask every time. And reminded her of the fact that she's grounded, so she KNOWS that the answer really is no. *sigh*

But, yeah, that's really most of Sunday.

Today ... I should clean the house.
I also need to run out and pick up milk.
And I need to pick up a card for a (retired) coworker of Michael's. A's wife passed on Friday.
Even though the company will be sending a card, Michael strongly feels that he should also send one from our family. And I agree. A was one of Michael's mentors when he started working at his company. It's good to let him know that there are bunches of people thinking of him.

I also wrote a couple of posts for my Sunday School blog ... I should email my students and let them know that those posts are up for them. And get the other email addresses for my other students. Wouldn't it be nice to let them be involved, too? :P

Then I should get caught up on reading my scriptures and get back in the habit of saying more prayers. And I should read the other manuals and prepare more for my class ... the usual.

And work more with Bubbles on reading and writing and numbers and colors ...

But I'm still loving my hair. ^_^

Well, I've started a second blog ... but it's geared for the Sunday School class that I'm teaching (and their families).

In it, I'm researching and answering questions that they ask in class.
And, since I'm not a scriptorian (at least, not yet), therefore unable to always give the appropriate scripturally-backed answers that these questions deserve, I figured that this would be a good way to address these questions and foster more learning for my students.

That, and if you really want to know what quotes I like from General Conference, you could follow my Twitter feed. Because that's the main reason I have Twitter, to follow the Twitter Stake during Conference. (It's a great way to learn the General Authorities' names, if you miss the words on the screen. And some folks on Twitter are awesome at bringing up sites with these people's background and stuff.^_^ )

Yesterday was ... a day. I was tired. I didn't do much housework. I did get caught up on the dishes. The kids are still grounded. I need to do more laundry.

And I'm just irritated by the whole mess.
Especially when I see UNWORN, CLEAN CLOTHES in the laundry.

So, the kids are now going to be doing their own washing and folding and putting away their clothes. At least until they stop putting clean clothes they just don't want to put away into the laundry.

Which means that I'm going through all the "dirty" clothes and taking out Bubbles's clothes to wash.

I'm just so dang tired of all this dreck.

Especially since every day that I have to talk to them and remind them and FOCUS THEM on the tasks at hand is a day that DOESN'T count toward them getting ungrounded.

They took about two hours to "clean" their room (There was improvement ... EVENTUALLY).
They moved all the chairs from the dining room into the kitchen ... and didn't vacuum (until NOW because I had to yell to get them to do it).

I am already tired of having to take away the remote before they get up so that they aren't tempted to watch shows.

I'm glad that Mom's coming up today. I need something to distract me from all this.

I also need to write letters to my Nana and to Gramma I ... it was in my calendar for yesterday, and I didn't do it.

I did get caught up on reading conference talks and my scriptures ... but I'd feel a heckuva lot more spiritual if I didn't have to harp and nag at Bruise and Bucket to JUST FOR THE LOVE OF PETE GET THINGS DONE WITHOUT HAVING TO BE TOLD IT'S NOT LIKE YOU DON'T HAVE CHORE CHARTS HANGING ON THE DOOR THAT YOU COULD LOOK AT OH WAIT YOU DO! THEN GET THINGS DONE SO WE CAN HAVE A HAPPY, PEACEFUL HOUSE AND I MIGHT NOT FEEL TOTALLY DRAINED OF THE WILL TO LIVE.

And Bubbles wanted to wear a swimsuit yesterday. So... she wore a swimsuit.
She's REALLY bummed that the outdoor pool is closed (and has been closed for two weeks. And won't open until at least Memorial Day weekend). Poor kid.

Well, it's time to do devotional and all that. Or else it's time for my head to explode ... Either or.

But I did finish my book and did my Khan Academy (83% complete in Fifth Grade Math), Duolingo, and Rosetta Stone ... so that's ... something. That and with my blogging on the Sunday School blog and all, I should feel like I've been productive. Meh.

The good, the bad, and the frustrating ...

It's been a good and bad last few days ...

I had forgotten to update my digital calendar that we had signed up to feed the missionaries ... Whoops!
But we got the house much cleaner and dinner made and had a nice visit with them.

I got my hair recolored. It's SO much better. I really didn't feel like myself as a blonde-blonde. And I didn't like my roots being so OBVIOUS (#ImSoVainIBetIThinkThisSongIsAboutMe).
I am still rather blonde, but I have some brown lowlights put in there that make my skin tone looks worlds better and it feels a LOT more natural. (It can read more grey, though, in some lights ... but I can handle that). I also got new purple streaks in the middle (aka "peekaboo streaks"), which are really fun.

I finally got around to painting my nails and toenails -- my fingernails are mostly nude, with a few accent nails that have a glitter topcoat on them; my toes are a deep violet.

Did I mention that Bucket's Betta, Blue, passed? Well, he did.
And I cleaned out the fish tank and we now have Falcor, a Dragon Scale Betta (He's got a light-teal body and deep-red fins. Quite pretty. He seems well-behaved like Blue).
He and Iggy (the Pleco) seem to get along well enough.

I am behind on dishes and laundry again. As usual.
I'm almost through my "for fun" book (The Night Circus). I'm enjoying it. But it's due on the 24th and I REALLY don't want more fines (I paid over $15 in library fines last week. FUN! Not.).

We went out on Saturday and bought some used LEGO (the kids each made a minifig and I picked up the two minifigs from retired series that I'd been YEARNING for [The movie star (Series 9) and the Hazmat guy (Series 4)]. Then we went to the LEGO store and the kids got more LEGO, even Bubbles got a Duplo kit. And we dropped by Deseret Book (and ran into Bruise's Cub Scout den leader), and went out for a LATE lunch (the kids' Summer Reading coupons sure came in handy for a free Kid's meal at Applebee's EACH) and headed home.

I taught my first Sunday School lesson with the 12 and 13-year-olds. I had five students. They're pretty fun. It's nice having a class that can TALK with you. We didn't really stay on the month's subject ... but we did talk about the Second Coming and repentance, so it was pretty good.

I also got permission from the Sunday School President in our ward to follow inspiration and start a blog to discuss (and confirm with Scriptural answers/references) what we talk about in class that I don't have ready answers/references to.
(FACT: It's a pet peeve of mine when people pass around doctrine that isn't confirmed. Like the Mormon Myth (which has been denounced from the First Presidency) that people from other dispensations of the gospel will bow to us. OR that Joseph Smith said that "if people could see through the veil to the Telestial Kingdom, they'd be killing themselves to get in." (Attributed, but unverified. Researched AGAIN, here.) ... But, yes, I'm not a fan of the "faith-promoting rumor." I prefer facts that can be verified. But that might be partway because my main Seminary teacher, Joan, demanded "Scriptural Answers," answers that were backed by scriptures.)

Also, the BAD part of the weekend ... Bruise and Bucket got themselves in to TROUBLE.
Bruise has been visibly exhausted lately. Bucket hasn't been much better.
We found out WHY ... they've been sneaking in their tablets (Strike ONE) at night into their room (STRIKE TWO) ... and they KNOW that this is against the house rules.

So, they're grounded. Indefinitely, but at least for two weeks. No tablets (It's a good thing that I have self-control, or I'd have broken them in front of those two jokers. ), no TV/Netflix/Movies, no going out to play, ... and they HAVE to do all their chores (without being reminded) for two weeks. I also want them to be reading their scriptures, writing a letter of apology to their dad and me, copying off the section in For the Strength of Youth about "Honesty and Integrity" into their journals ... along with the Honesty section in True to the Faith and a few scriptures referenced.

This isn't the first time that this has happened. And, obviously, they haven't really learned not to do it. We had a talk at the dining room table this morning, where I did NOT yell (I'm getting better, see?), but I DID tell them that I was so disappointed in them that there aren't words in the human language to express it. And I told them about the consequences (being grounded AND their distancing themselves from Heavenly Father and making it VERY hard for the Holy Ghost to be with them ... making it VERY hard to have a happy family, since their actions show a huge amount of disrespect for their parents, their little sister [whose sleep is also affected AND who tries to emulate their actions], and THEMSELVES. Because when you make bad choices and are dishonest, you are showing a lack of respect for yourself.) ... so, we were all down and unhappy. But I did make sure to let them know that I do love them (which is why I'm so disappointed in them) and to give them hugs before they left for the bus.

But here's how their lives are going to look for the next while:

• Get up, get ready for school. Make sure lunch is packed.
• Morning devotional. Read scriptures. Pray. 
• Chores/Workbook
• Go to school.
• Come home. 
• Chores/workbook/homework/RosettaStone/KhanAcademy/Duolingo/Nap
• More chores
• Dinner/Showers/Family Scriptures/Prayer/Sleep

It's not going to be tons of fun.
And I've told them that as soon as Daddy or I have to point out what's not been done, that their two weeks is restarting ... even if they've managed 13 days straight. These resets are going to be harsh. And part of this is that they are going to show their godly sorrow (sorry for making a bad choice, NOT just for getting caught. Because they should be most sorry for their decision's effect of taking them farther from God and hurting themselves and others) and have a GOOD attitude here at home.
No whining, no complaining/rolling the eyes/stomping ... We are going to have a HAPPY, PEACEFUL HOME WHERE THE SPIRIT CAN DWELL -- OR BUST.

However, I think that the "no-tablets" rule is going to be good. There will be fewer distractions (for Bruise, especially) and they won't get sucked into watching shows so much.

Well, I need to go "pack a lunch" for Bubbles. And I should go clean up ... especially vacuum, since Bubbles got into some glitter that Bucket "accidentally" left out (that Bucket never asked to get into in the first place). And I should finally clean the fridge and sort a million cupboards ... but I really just want to either nap or read or redo yesterday night and  warn those older two within an inch of their lives that Daddy and I are NOT NEARLY as stupid as they seem to think we are.

Ugh.

But, at least, I'm caught up again on Conference Talks and reading my scriptures ... I should read a billion other manuals and prepare for next week's class ...

Even if I DO have to teach every week now, my class is fun. AND I get to go to Relief Society again. I've really missed that.

I'll survive today ... and the next few weeks. I know I can ... because I'm going to be reading my scriptures and stuff and PRAYING LOADS.

Yo-yo-yiggity-yo

Yeah, I know it's bad when my MOM says to me, out of the blue, "So, just how long has it been since you blogged?"

A long time.
A DANG long time.

So, let's see what's gone on, in a nutshell, since then.

CUE THE MONTAGE!

• My mom had another birthday. She's 29 again, which makes it awkward ... since I'm older than her. I know, I know ... She CLAIMS that she's 39 again now, but that only gives me four years and a few months until I catch up again.
  (Joking, joking ... she admits to her age. And not just because she gets a discount at the bread store. I just like to give her some ribbing about her being younger than me.)
  (And you have to realize that this is coming from ME ... the girl who still claims that her Nana is 57. Since Nana was 57 for YEARS. When she turned 80, I even sent her flowers that said "Happy 57th Birthday, Nana!" which REALLY confused her for a bit. And not just because she has dementia. Once I explained that I really DID know that she's NOT 57, she did think it was funny.)
• Bucket is worried about her Betta fish, Blue. His fins are getting really beat up. And he's not as active. But we've had him for a few years, so We're just going to make his end-of-life days as pleasant as possible. ... So I should probably clean out the fish tank.
• I was caught up in doing the dishes for a little while. Not anymore. And I have laundry up the wahzoo happening here (I have underthings in the wash so that I'll HAVE underthings tomorrow. Yeah, that's probably TMI ... but I WAS concentrating on getting the KIDS' stuff cleaned first. Oh well.)
• I was released from my calling as Nursery Leader in our ward (church congregation in Mormon-speak). I did FINALLY get that bulletin board (Apparently, they had installed a bulletin board MONTHS ago ... in some other room in the building. Ha! But ours was installed  on the 6th. And I busted my buns to get the bulletin board planned and put together before I was released ... which was officially done last week.)
• My new calling at church is Sunday School teacher for the 12- and 13-year-olds. There IS a manual, but it's online and there's just GUIDELINES as far as topics go. I feel quite ill-prepared ... but we'll see how it goes. (Hide yo' kids, hide yo' wife, hide yo' husbands, 'cause Allanna's in charge of teaching the youths!)
• I got together everything for Bruise and Bucket's registration for the local Strings classes. Bruise will be in the Beginners' level class again. Bucket has moved up to Intermediate. And I have their registration filled out, their scholarship applications done, the check written out ... so we're ready to turn this in before the due date!
• I started doing Khan Academy more. I've mastered K-4 math and am 74% through 5th grade math. (I had originally thought to start with Algebra. HA HA HA. No. My skills are waaaaay too rusty. But y'all should be proud of me for persevering. Math was not my forte ... because I feel quite intimidated by it. But I'm working my way through it.
• I'm also back into doing my DuoLingo ... but only German and Spanish. With my 15-day streak (so far), I got caught back up with all my skills and have even surpassed where I had been. It tells me that I'm 42% fluent in Spanish and 31% fluent in German. So that's nice.
• I FINALLY got our Rosetta Stone program installed on the computer. The main problem that I had was when I tried to install from online, the language packs were ALL incomplete. So I had to have their Customer Service help me (She deleted the incomplete packs and let me reinstall them anew from the discs I have). Phew!
• The kids FINALLY cleaned their room. FINALLY.
• Bubbles is starting "Mutti Preschool" -- My mom is now working with Bubbles to make sure that she's learning the skills she'll need for Kindergarten. Yesterday, they made a poster with a picture. They concentrated on words with the letter "o." Mom was actually impressed by how much Bubbles has already learned (huzzah!) ... though, little Homeskillet there really likes to make poop-jokes. So there you have it.
• I'm determined to change my hair again. People like the light blonde ... but, well, it really just doesn't FEEL like me. And the upkeep is a little crazy, since I don't like having visible roots that much. But it was a good experience.
• We went to the local Renaissance Faire last weekend. Bruise came home with a new wooden sword and shield. Bucket adopted a new "pet" dragon (I've taken to referring to her as "The Babysitter of Dragons."), and I got some perfume oils. Bubbles didn't make any requests, but she did wear her cloak from last year nearly the entire time.
• After the Faire, the kids went home with Mom C (who watched them) while Michael and I bought LEGO Minifigs (I totally have the banshee now. And she's awesome!) then went out to dinner with our friends Mark and Lacey (who are finally moving a lot closer than they've been!). It was lots of fun to get together with them.
• My van died on Thursday morning. Bubbles and I had driven (not far) to go shopping (Bruise needed a new watch -- and I got one on clearance for only a couple more dollars than just getting a watchband cost ... and I had bought and returned TWO watchbands by that point ... and I needed flour after having made 5 batches of playdough for the Nursery cupboard [If you really care, here's the rundown: Pink/Vanilla-scented, Orange/Wild Orange-scented, Blue/Peppermint-scented, Green/Lime-scented, and Purple/Lavender-Vanilla-scented]) ... so it was good that it was within walking distance and that I did have a stroller in the back. I locked up the van and left it in the parking lot and waited for Michael to get home from work to jump it so we could get it home. ...
  Friday, we took it to Les Schwab (after jumping it AGAIN) to see if it was the battery (which was under warranty) ... AND IT WAS. So, $3.55 later, I have a BRAND NEW battery in my van WHICH RUNS. I had such a crazy amount of relief running through me that it's a wonder I didn't faint. I know that it's totally a first world problem and all ... but I'm glad that it was fixed before I have to run the kids to Strings lessons (and, eventually maybe, LEGO Robotics in Bruise's case) AND that it was such a cheap fix. SERIOUSLY, it was awesome and I'm really thankful, since we'd been PRAYING a lot.
• Bad news - one of my aunts has been diagnosed with breast cancer.
  Good news - Her MRI showed that it's just that one bit and it should be taken out and treated and stuff soon. Another answer to prayers. Phew.
• Bubbles is a bit low in her iron-count, so I need to be working to get her to eat more iron-rich foods. But she's 28 pounds now (at 3 1/2 years), so that's good.
• Bruise had a few Cub Scout meetings. Last week was the bicycle rodeo. ... Bruise and Bucket have outgrown their bikes. Looks like Santa knows what to get them, huh?
• Michael got another promotion ... "But it doesn't come with a pay raise," he told me. And that was ... okay. I mean, it's great that they can charge more for his work and it's more responsibility ... then we learned that, no, it does have a raise. Which is nice. 
• We went to a friends' house for dinner Monday night. Another family in the ward who we like and have worked along with the parents in different callings. We had a BBQ and talked a lot and it was fun. The kids (theirs and ours) were jumping on the trampoline. Their 14-year-old son and I talked a bunch.
  (He's a joker, which is fun. I went to shake his hand and he finagled it so that I grabbed his forearm instead. Which made me laugh like when Robert Gere shuts the necklace box on Julia Roberts' hand in Pretty Woman. You can watch that on YouTube, that clip, if you don't know the reference.)
• Did I mention that Michael's spoiled me with LEGO?
  He bought me the Mystery Machine and the Big Bang Theory set. They're sitting on my printer right now. ^_^
• I was feeling so chipper friday, after the van's battery was replaced, that Bubbles and I baked Orange and Raspberry Sherbet cookies (it was out of a boxed mix). She had lots of fun. And I did, too, with my cute sous chef.
• Other, further back catch-ups: We met with my friend, Brooke, for lunch; we went to Pioneer Days in my hometown with my stepdad's nephew and his wife (both LOVELY people. Jeff, my step-cousin, REALLY wanted to buy "the princess" [Bubbles] cotton candy ... which he did. And, golly, that cotton candy was GINORMOUS. Jeff would have bought more than one, and I'm so glad that he didn't! It was big enough for our family to share ... I have a picture of Bubbles "helping" to hold it and ... well, it looks nearly as big as SHE is!); we went swimming at the local outdoor pool a bunch; Bruise and Bucket finished up their swimming lessons with Bob at the indoor pool ... We went to the Art and Air Festival (no henna tattoo this time). The kids and I went with Cousin Kathleen and her son to the Air and Space Museum in McMinnville. We got to visit Nana and that side of the family. We now have Nana's other couch. I had a PTC meeting (I have this month's coming up TOMORROW evening) where we met the new principal. We went to the kids' Open House at school and met their teachers. The kids have started school (Fourth graders. I have TWO fourth graders!). I got Visit Taught, which hadn't happened in a LONG time. We had a playdate over at Robyn's -- Bruise and Bucket played with her kids (Bubbles did for a bit then played on my phone) and Robyn and I got caught up and worked at setting up a shelf for homeschooling ... which is bittersweet, since Bruise and her son are besties and have always been in the same classes ... until now *sigh* ... It just means that I need to be more proactive about setting up playdates, right?
  Michael and Bubbles and Bucket also went to the Stake Daddy-Daughter camp-out last month. They had a great time.
  And Bruise had fun staying up late and getting to eat ice cream OUT OF THE CONTAINER, which was pretty awesome. ^_^
• We're working our way through The Chronicles of Narnia (saying that always makes me think of that SNL music video, "Lazy Sunday"). We're now into Prince Caspian, which means that (since we started with The Magician's Nephew) we're nearly halfway through the series.
• Michael and I are reading through the rest of L.J. Smith's Forbidden Game series. We just started the third and final book last night ... so, in a few more days, I can actually TALK to him about it. (TBH, he's still waiting for me to read through a few books [*cough**cough*The Scorch Trials, The Death Curse, The Kill Order, Hollow City, Jackaby, The Westing Game, etc *cough**cough*] so we can talk about THOSE.)
  He's also reading Code Name Verity and Ready Player One (we started that one together, so he's nearly halfway through it).
  I still need to also read The Night Circus before it's due back at the library. And I have, like, a metric ton of other books in my TBR pile. #BibliophleProbs
• I've been working to be better at reading my scriptures and praying and all ... so I have a prayer journal going. It seems to help me focus a little more as I'm writing my prayers down. I still say prayers, too. In case you were worried.
  I'm getting close to finishing Numbers in the Old Testament. Doctrine and Covenants were harder to get through, since it's not at all in chronological order. But, if I keep with this reading schedule, I'll be through the Standard Works by next fall.
  And I'm also more than halfway through the 40-day General Conference reading challenge. I try to stay a day ahead ... so when I got THREE DAYS behind, you know that I fell off the wagon there for a bit. BUT I'm caught up ... just need to get a day ahead again.
  

And so, you see that between taking care of kids, taking care of the house, trying to stay abreast of studying scriptures and foreign languages (well, just two for now), and getting sucked into Facebook and the internet, I didn't MEAN to neglect you. It just happened.

Now, I should do some math, German, Spanish, and then go shopping and drop off the kids' Strings registration and application for scholarships, then get Bubbles fed and down for a nap and read my scriptures and conference talks and pray and write in that journal and .... maybe take a nap, too.