Teh Boobage ...

Yeah, the title is a link. A wonderful LOLcat link. One that makes me laugh every single time. ^_^

Here, though is another link about people getting all up-ins about NIPs (Nursing In Public).
However this link is about a nursing mom who's not only asked not to nurse in public at someone's home (which is understandable -- the way the author of the email asks, however, is NOT) BUT the nursing mom's ALSO asked to regulate her husband (the brother of the email's author) shirt choice!?! From the email itself that the sister-in-law sent to the nursing mom (and you get some follow-up in comment 47 ... Yeowch!), I'm getting some blatant (or should I say OVERT) hints of passive-aggressive-it's-all-about-me-NOT-my-daughter's-birthday-ness-essence.

In the word of Stephanie from Full House, "How Rude!!"

So, since it IS my blog, and I CAN, I'm going to wax eloquent (yet again) on my breastfeeding experiences. Because I've sure enjoyed it. (And I'm not trying to be smug or boastful. I know that I was totally blessed -- waaaaaaay more than I deserve -- to be able to breastfeed at all. Since I've had some friends who've impressed me so much getting through some touch circumstances. More power to you. You are stronger women than I. Seriously.)

I have nursed in public before. (I've even nursed my now "older" babies -- over 6 months -- in public).

The time that I received the most comments of a not-so-positive nature ... at a pizza parlor with my family. One aunt was worried that I might be arrested for indecency (not possible. Breastfeeding is not a form of public nudity. One reason I love my state). My mom (she's so funny. I do love her) wanted me to cover up more. Still, as a new mom, if Bruise was covered, I couldn't see what I was doing. I accidentally flashed her and my stepdad some boob as I got Bruise latched on (we had used all the f0rmula we'd packed on Bucket). And I accommodated her by using the blanket that I had with me. A quilt. (Not exactly discreet, I think. :P) It kinda makes me laugh.
I can understand that they were worried about the other kids running around the pizza parlor getting an eyeful ... but I was wearing a nursing shirt. Once Bruise was latched on, we were good to go.

Still, I have to say that the times that I haven't used a blanket, I've not had any negative feedback.
(In fact, a few months ago ... I think it was March ... I saw a new mom nursing her child in a mall. I totally gave her a smile and a thumbs-up. She smiled back.)

We've long reached the point where I can't nurse Bruise and Bucket modestly in public. They're rolling around in my lap, grabbing each other's hair, pulling my shirt up even more than they used to ... It's kinda crazy. But I still enjoy the whole nursing. I get to feel needed. And I don't freak out about my kiddos not getting the fat they need in their diet or whatnot.

I still think the funnier times that I've breastfed have been involving other people:

1 - Impressing my aunt (NOT the one who was worried about public nudity. This is my other aunt) by tandem feeding. She was SO amazed. It makes me smile. (Ju, if you're reading, "hi! Love you!)

2 - Nursing (I think it was Bucket) at Michael's cousin's house. H (his cousin) walked in on me. Was I flustered? No. Was he? A little. It's sweet when boys are SO worried that they've embarrassed you. (I know he wasn't scarred. His wife has breastfed, too.)

3 - Nursing Bruise in the church lobby. A member of the bishopric (our church's clergy for you friends of other faiths ^_^), coming over and kissing Bruise on the head while I'm sitting and nursing. Different, but not unwelcome. Brother H is good people. And, regardless of being from an older generation, gave an obvious -- yet silent -- declaration on his stance on NIP. Rock on!

4 - My second baby shower (I had one down in my hometown before the kiddos were born. The second in the town we lived in, due to giving birth early AND scheduling difficulties, was after the kiddos were born.)where Bruise (I think) got hungry. I figured that due to the age spread, I should leave to feed him. Sister B was all like, "No, stay! Isn't it great that right now you can supply everything that your children need?" So, there was nursing galore. (Since after Bruise got done, Bucket needed some milk. And I nursed her while helping clean up. And people were impressed. Which was cool.)

So, yeah, overall, I've LOVED my experiences nursing. Am I ready to give it up, after 18 months?

(No.)

It's really funny. Before I had kids, I knew that I wanted to nurse. I was hoping (HOPING) to make it six months.
Then, after I started nursing and as time went on, I figured, "Well, let's shoot for a year." Whereas, Michael figured that once I started getting bit I'd stop.
Then, regardless of the biting (which, thank heavens, has been very rare), I kept going. I get my cuddles, I feel needed, I have a failsafe for knowing that my kidlets are getting the food they need ... and, as a bonus, I'm burning some calories. ^_^

Now that I've made the 18-month mark, I keep thinking ... Hmm, maybe I can get to the WHO-recommended two-year mark.

And, yeah, part of it is because I AM too lazy to fix "real food." :P

it's not easy being green ...

Michael, as I watch Brotherhood 2.0, will accuse me of liking one or the other of the Green brothers best.

I've been reading Hank Green's articles in mental_floss since before I knew who Hank Green was.

John, however, is now one of my new favorite authors. (Even though he does throw profanity around more than I'd prefer ... but, for who knows what reason, I don't mind READING profanity as much as I mind HEARING it.)

They're both brilliant. And hilarious.

Hank was, in the early days of the internet -- before everyone and their dog had email addresses --, known as a bit of an expert on Mars. As in, the BBC contacted his 15-year-old self for help on navigating through NASA's webpage. (I'm guessing a little on the age. He was in 10th grade. But STILL!)
Hank also writes songs. I still find myself humming "Helena, Montana" every so often.

AND Hank has this awesome quote from when he was interviewed:
7-Imp: What is your favorite curse word? (optional)

Hank: A lot of curse words are just bad words for good things, so on principle I don’t like that they even exist. Like they’re words for body parts, or functions, or animals, stuff that we should appreciate and not be ashamed of. I like curses that are actually bad things. I say “Poop on a stick!” a lot. It’s hard to imagine a situation where poop on a stick can be good.

Yeah ... AND Hank really fostered my crush on Neil Gaiman.
Well, Hank AND my friend, Roxy. She told me about his Sandman graphic novels ... and Coraline, which is being made into a movie (AS WE SPEAK) with music by THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS (Squeeee!!!1!). (And I loved MirrorMask, too.) (And am looking forward to the movie of Stardust.)

Now, if I could just start building up my confidence to post stuff In My Pants, I could be a real and genuine Nerdfighter.

Workin' It ... my booty, that is ...

So today I (finally) got out of bed, put on my workout clothes and hit the treadmill after brushing my teeth.

I didn't do a mile. I only did .85 of one. I can't even say that I was going a WHOLE lot faster. And now, after about 30 minutes and a shower, I still feel rather like crap. I've had about a half liter of water ... but I'm still not feeling as god as I could.

And, Kari, don't be too proud of me for working out while it's hot. We have central air here. (One of my clinchers when buying a home.) So, really, I have no excuse NOT to work out ... well, excepting my habit of being a lazybones and not doing it.

And, Michael, glad you're reading. ^_^ Even though, when you first started talking, I almost thought that I had told you more on the phone than I really had. Ha ha ha, Honey. You're a funny-joke-man. :P
(For those of you NOT my husband, when I got back from a Webelos meeting where our one boy didn't show up ... and his father, a cubmaster, didn't bother to let the other leader know ... Grr --- BUT, getting back to my point, Michael started talking about my workout regime. Things that I didn't recall telling him ... but that I DID know that I blogged. He's all talking, and then I started grinning and blurted out, "You read MY blog!" -- He's not into blogging, refuses to get a MySpace page [if he did, he'd boot my #1 friend to #2 ... but since he's never going to to it -- he's bound and determined -- it's not an issue. M, being my friend since 3rd grade, is safe in her spot], but I still love him. ^_^)

By the way, Blood and Chocolate ... Not a good movie. I remember reading it after LOVING The Silver Kiss ... Maybe I'm just not into werewolves or something. Who knows? But, back to the movies ... the special effects? Not so hot. But they did get real wolves, as opposed to The Day After Tomorrow (which I couldn't even pay attention to), with their cheap-heinie CGI wolves.

Also, I've noticed that I'm not really good at watching movies anymore. I'm out of the habit. I'll watch a movie while reading a book or painting my nails or something. It's like I have to multitask or something. (Exception: episodes of Firefly and old favorites.) Why is that?

And today, since I'm feeling lazy, I'll only include the highlights of my workout soundtrack (Note to self, HOW many times, exactly, does "Lady" by Lenny Kravitz appear on that playlist?? Gotta fix that. Had to skip it twice.):
"Hey Ya" - OutKast
"Sikamikanico" - Red Hot Chili Peppers
"Feel Good Inc" - Gorillaz
"Break Me Shake Me" - Savage Garden

There you have it. The rest of the songs were skipped.

And, as a bonus, here's a taste of my crazy dream chronicles:
I was in a semi-Jane-Austeny-novel-world.
I had written someone's name (not mine or whoever I was) in green ink. It was an obvious forgery, since that person only ever used green ink.
I woke up before I got caught.

I have no flippin' clue what it means. Maybe that I need to read more Austen? Maybe that I should buy some green pens? Maybe that I hate being in this semi-calling-but-not-since-it's-not-in-my-ward-but-my-bishop--hasn't-put-me-elsewhere ... and I don't like not having any clue as to who to go to for information about this new ward (well, except for Michael, since he can get me information) or having any authority or whatnot. Grrr.

Yeah. Limbo is not an LDS doctrine. Heck, at this point, it's no longer really a Catholic doctrine (warning: satire column at that link. It may be offensive to some. Because, as satire, that is its job description). And, even though it's sort of nice having so many people being so glad that I'm still acting in this calling until my bishop decides if he's keeping me here or placing me in some other position, I'd much rather have something official, know where to go for information, and have the authority (from being called, sustained, and set apart) to tell my leaders what I'd like to see happen. (Not to speak ill of the Lord's anointed, BUT the other leader and I are feeling like our superiors are being a bit of space cases, bless their hearts).

Yes, I'm getting a little punchy and rebellious.
I suck. I should be more of a lady. And assertive. Not passive-aggressive.

Any pointers? Michael tells me I should talk to our bishop for some guidance. And I know he's right ... I just have to figure out what I need to say (and I'm probably going to do it in email, so both he and I can have a meeting of our minds at our own leisure. Yet another reason I pink puffy heart the internet and it's internetty goodness).

Allanna, OUT! (Hey, if Ryan Seacrest can do it, I can too!)

We're runnin' ...

Today -
Had the treadmill set on a little higher. Ran a bit. (Even sprinted a little. Haven't done that for a long time.)

Estimated 115 calories burned (since we don't have the plug-in thingamajig that takes your pulse ... Well, I haven't the foggiest about how it estimates the calories). Jogged about 1.15 miles.

Times I nearly fell off, trying to reach my water: 2
How much water I drank: 3/4 L

Today's soundtrack (my iPod got recharged. Songs have been shuffled. Keeps it feeling fresh and all. Yeah, that's how I roll --- I think the oxygen-deprivation's gone to my head.):

Song 2 - Blur
Abracadabra - Sugar Ray
Suddenly I See - KT Tunstall
Ch-Check It Out - Beastie Boys [Skipped]
I Fell In Love With a Girl - The White Stripes
Rock Your Body - Justin Timberlake [Skipped]
Celebrity Skin - Hole
Plan B - Mute Math [Skipped]
Ready for the Good Times - Shakira [Skipped]
Black Suits Coming - Will Smith [Skipped]
Come On Eileen - Save Ferris [Skipped]
Let's Get It Started - Black Eyed Peas

Feel: Sweaty like the pig. But good. In desperate need of a shower. Desperate.

But I'm learning never to underestimate the power of music. And I'm so glad to have an iPod. A bazillion points to Michael.

now I'm getting a shower before the kiddos demand to be freed (even though I JUST put them to nap about 30 minutes ago) and try to finish the Maltese Falcon while I still can.

Wither the Fries?!?

So, as a bit of a lactivist, I get worked up when I hear of restaurants and airlines and stores that kick out women for having the NERVE (*gasp!!*) to nurse in public and offend people who think that an adult's "comfort" is more of a priority than the security and care of an infant (or a toddler, even ... heck! My kidlets are ALL about comfort nursing. And I they're 18 months old! ... However, since I can't tandem nurse modestly, I nurse in private. Still, if I could get away with feeding only one at a time, I might still do a NIP [Nurse in Public]).

But seriously, THIS is crazy.

And I say this not just because it boggles the mind, but because I have some friends who would have loved to nurse, but couldn't.

I think that it's just plain STUPID to get up in everyone's grill about how their baby is getting their food.
Heck, if people want to use f0rmula, that's their choice.
And, just because someone's feeding a baby using a bottle, that doesn't mean that there IS f0rmula in that bottle. (When I watched T's son for a month, 90% of the time the bottle he received had her milk in it.)

Geez Louise ... There are things that we really should be all up-ons about.
The use of a bottle vs. the use of the breast should not be it.

Now, the people who say that f0rmula is healthier for babies ... that it can prevent obesity??
That's something that I take a bit of offense with. (You tellin' me that my milk isn't good enough?? Hello!! It's all-natural, grade-A milk! You can't say that about your processed milk. So there! *sticks out tongue and wiggles booty in their general direction*)

Other things to get all up-ons about:
Child abuse
Repeat offenders
Honor killings
Terrorism
The price of oil (Why is it THAT expensive? Are they milking frakkin' DIAMONDS to get it??)
Etc.

I think that it's great for a baby to be fed. Some babies never learn to nurse productively. Some mothers can't establish a good milk supply. Some have physical conditions that make it too difficult.
If you've ever nursed, I salute you.
If you've ever wanted to, I salute you.
If you've pumped, I SALUTE you (I used to try to build up a reserve. THAT's some hard work!! T would come over and nurse while pumping the other side during her lunch break. T, I SALUTE you. K, you too. You da bomb!!)

I think that we, especially as women and mothers, need to be kind.

How else are we supposed to teach our children (or nieces and nephews ... or our FELLOW PEOPLE) that everyone deserves (and should be treated with) respect if we don't do so ourselves?

Here's where I get insanely candid.

So, I now have a goal as far as my body goes.

I'm just a little bit fat. According to the BMI charts, I'm just over the line (by two-tenths) into obese.

I'd like to, for the sakes of my family, my health and my vanity, get my BMI down into the normal range. To do that, I need to lose 31 pounds. I *could* (technically) lose up to about 70 pounds ... but since I find losing weight (and just the act of getting motivated enough to get off my lazy duff and actually, I don't know, EXERCISE) a challenge, I'm going to use the smaller numbers for now. Especially since I haven't seen myself weigh that little (in comparison to what I weigh now, thankyouverymuch) in about, oh, FIVE YEARS.

This weekend, as Michael helped T2 move, she called me and asked if we'd like a used treadmill.
Since I've been hoping that having a treadmill in the house would be motivation, I jumped on the chance. My only question was "Does it work?" THAT's how eager I was.

It takes up some of our precious room. The kids like to climb on it. (In fact, Bruise, sporting another bump and bruise from this weekend -- fell off of a chair onto the corner of his toybox -- was sitting on it this morning, reading C is for Coco.) Michael's used it a couple of times.

This morning (not even ten minutes ago) was my turn. I re-plugged it in (thanks, kidlets), turned on my iPod, and let loose.
17 minutes later, after completing one mile, burning about 100 calories, sweating like a pig, I stopped.

And even though I HATE being sweaty and feeling my boobs and butt a-bouncing as I walk/jog, I felt GOOD. I'm one mile towards my goal.

And, thanks to my iPod, I had an excellent workout soundtrack. I only got through a few songs, but they were good ones:
"Surf Wax America" - Weezer
"Body Movin'" - Beastie Boys
"Smile" - Lily Allen (Yes, it does drop an F-bomb. My bad. It's not very well-edited.)
"Suddenly I See" - KT Tunstall
and
"Rock You Like a Hurricane" - The Scorpions

However, I also discovered today, while trying to fill in my statistics for the Glamour Body challenge ... I can only do, like, FIVE modified push-ups. And my crunches are PITIFUL.

So, while I'm using my treadmill for my cardio (so I don't have to be all self-conscious as I try to load up kids for a jog OUTSIDE, HEAVENS FORBID!! Where people might LOOK at ME and my blubbers a-bouncin!!!), I can work on a little strength training and (ESPECIALLY) toning.

So, maybe in about two years when I have my (cue: hyperventilating) 10 year high school reunion, I won't be quite like I am right now. Hopefully I will be MUCH better.

And, I feel the need to be. Even though I have a great husband and a wonderful family ... but the CHEERLEADER is getting married. Even though I'm a college graduate (and I somehow managed to graduate with honors ... and I didn't mean to, since I didn't really realize that it was tied in with grades ... and I'm not trying to brag. I just like getting good grades. REALLY good grades. It's how I was raised.), I just don't feel that I can compete with a really popular girl who teaches dance for a living and is getting married.

I should be ashamed of the Nerdfighter that I am. A true Nerdfighter would embrace the fact that she wasn't all popular and svelte her whole life. She would rejoice in the fact that she reads. A LOT. And that Joshilyn Jackson (JOSHILYN JACKSON!!) replied to an email. And ERIC D. SNIDER(!!!!) referred to her as "devoted reader Allanna," because THAT, there, is FAME. Because he is amazing. And has responded to multiple emails from her (which makes me, I mean HER, squeeee with excitement). AND Joshilyn Jackson forwarded this Nerdfighter's compliments to Shanna Swendson, who was happy to hear them!

I mean, what's not to be thrilled about about this girl?

But, you know, I always manage to find something. Like now -- I'm a little bit fat, don't fit into my jeans from high school, and I have clutter around and still have boxes in the front room of our house.

STILL, I'm working on these things. I've lost a little weight since being pregnant. I make more healthy choices as I eat -- even though I do NOT cut out treats. I MUST have my ice cream. And I start to eat less of it when I have it. Sometimes. ^_^
I'm trying the FLYlady stuff again. I'm not good at wearing shoes or getting a shower first thing ... but I can get better.

And, you know, I'm determined to get better at spiritual things. I really rather suck at reading my scriptures. I get a daily email from Read the Scriptures with my daily reading. And I SKIM IT. *Gah!!*
Sure, I pray. With the kiddos or with Michael. I need to work on MY relationship with my Heavenly Father.
I also need to get in the habit of having Family Home Evening. Since we've got the munchkins, I think I'm going to start using the Nursery manual (since I can access it online. Since I'm all FRUGAL like that) for the lessons.
Since the kiddos are still pretty pre-verbal (but Bucket is TRYING!!!), I can't assign them prayers or songs ... and I need to expose them to the Children's Hymns more. And the regular hymns. (Hmmm. I think 90% of those are available online. I LOVE the Church's website!)

Well, I should sweep, mop, vacuum, finish up the laundry, prepare for my (maybe last, who knows?) Webelos meeting, get ready for FHE and the Great-grandfolks (the kiddos great-grandparents, not mine. Mine have all ... um ... left this mortal coil, per se.), read a library book, watch The Maltese Falcon (since I fell asleep for most of it. Gah!!), and clear the clutter from my desk and the kitchen counter-thing.
Oh, and get a shower, too.
Among other little tasks I'd like to complete. Just so I feel all productive and crap.

So, I'd better, like, shut up and get to work. Just maybe. ^_^

Confessions

I feel the need to get a few things off my chest.

1. I'm a bad Mormon. I love coffee-flavored and Irish cream-flavored things.
And when I'm extremely bad, like toeing the line of Perdition-and-maybe-Outer-Darkness, I eat some Ben and Jerry's Dublin Mudslide ice cream. And savor each and every sinfullicious bite.

2. I just about cried with gratitude for the beneficence that is Sarah Jessica "Fashion is Not A Luxury. It's a Right" Parker. Have you READ about Bitten, her line of clothing? Pieces start at around $20 (What the chicken? I totally misread that at first. It gets better-->) prices top out in the $20 range ... and she makes them in sizes 0-22! A celebrity, a designer, that realizes that not all women (a) are stick figures and (b) have a bazillion dollars to spend on an accessory, let alone a pair of jeans or a shirt or something.
I heart her.

3. I am irrational.
Michael and I were discussing how Bruise and Bucket would be going into Nursery at church ... we'd have two hours free of hissing at them to "Be QUIET!" or chasing them around the ward building (and, in my case, slamming my GINORMOUS DIAPER BAG OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM [!!!], DEATH AND DESTRUCTION into innocent bystanders).
And I got a little chocked up that I won't have a little whippersnapper with me the whole time at church.
(The only downfall to being this free: I'll have NO excuse for not paying attention in Relief Society. Drat!)
(ADDENDUM: Bruise and Bucket LOVED Nursery. It was odd not having to wrestle a little one for my piece of mind ... but I might just get used to it.)

4. I think that my craziest pet peeve is people who mix up similar words. I get uptight about this.
Everyone understands the differences between "to," "two," and "too."
Same with "yea," "yay," "yeah," "ya", and "yah."
And if they don't, they should.
When someone types "Yea!", I immediately want to respond with "Forsooth!!!"
Yes. I really do. Uncontrollably. I have to REALLY suppress this urge.
And "yah"? That's for directing livestock.
"Ya" -- total Anglicized bastardization of the German "ja" ("yes").
It works that last nerve I have.
And I'm kinda hypocritical, too. Since I don't always pay COMPLETE AND TOTAL ATTENTION as I type.

So sue me.

Happy Independence Day! (Unless you're not American ... then, um, Happy Fourth of July!)

Today we have a BBQ to go to. It should be fun.
The last two episodes ever taped of Drive will be aired tonight. We're taping them, at the least. No, FOX are big, fat liars who WILL NOT air the last two episodes (that I've only been waiting TWO+ MONTHS FOR) after they SAID that they WOULD air them. {NOTE: I had to search through the FOX website. They've moved them to July 13th. Same 8/7c time slot. If they move it ONE MORE TIME, I'll be ready to send them some serious, serious hate mail.)

Instead, we're stuck with Anger Management with Adam Sandler. Which I truly couldn't care one iota about. (I started to watch it once. I try to feel guilty that I don't know how it ends.) As you can tell, it's not one of my favorite movies. Neither does it have ANYTHING AT ALL to do with this holiday ... or is it a cool-at-all movie. Why couldn't they have, at least, shown Independence Day with our favorite "sassy black man"? (Sorry, grammar elite, the Brit punctuation makes more sense in that sentence.)

Oh well, we'll set off some bottle rockets and play with sparklers.

I finally got one of the library holds I originally requested in April 2006. It's a set of CDs of 80s music. There are some seriously good songs on here. It makes me happy. I also have started Terrier by Tamora Pierce. And I'll be devouring An Abundance of Katherines by John Green along with Wicked Lovely ... and about 20 other books that I want to get through. Six of the books I picked up were my holds that had arrived ... I grabbed a few that I had been wanting to read off of the shelves.

And now I've really gotten book-geek-ed out. Sorry.

That'd be a good name for a band ...

I was talking to R (another of my bestest friends).
She was buying a dress since she had some extra spending money (on account of her husband spending more than we thought he had on his hobby -- he bought some stuff for his online game from an, ahem, alternative dealer).

"Black market gil," I said. "That'd be a good name for a punk band."
Then I went off about how SHE should start this band and dedicate their first song to her husband and I started making up lyrics in an affected punk-rock voice. And, as I tried to say "loooooooo-ooo-ve," it sounded odd. Like Chewbacca.

And since, naturally (and I love to say "naturally" in sentences where its meaning has some irony), whenever I think of zombies, I think of R (which she and I also joke about), I came up with "Zombie Chewbacca." And I told her that she should dress her younger daughter as Zombie Chewbacca for Halloween, because it'd be cool.

OR maybe "Zombie Chewbacca" would be the first hit by Black Market Gil.

You never know.

THEN I thought aloud that R could TOTALLY scrapbook those pictures of Offspring2 in a Zombie Chewbacca costume. And I nearly started to cry from the absolute brilliance and hilarity OF a scrapbooking page of a one-year-old child dressed as a ZOMBIE CHEWBACCA.

And then I wondered aloud if it's PMS that's making my sense of humor all punchy and crazy. Then I immediately responded to myself that, no, I'm always this way, nevermind.

And then we talked about life and our kids and how we missed each other and she's needing to try on dresses so she had to go, bye.

But, if I ever have a surplus of fake fur (as if I ever HAVE had ANY at ALL ever before), and I desperately need a costume, I suppose that I have an option.

And if you ever steal my idea ..... I SO want PICTURES. Pre-scrapbooked, please.
I'll try not to wet myself.

In other news, I went to the library. A book that the (electronic)card catalog showed as being lost was there. On the shelf. The library ghosts love me.

And I left with TWO BAGS FULL of books.
Because I'm a weak-willed person.

But I'm able to cross off quite a few books from my list of "To Check Out and Read/Study/Ponder (if they're in when I go to the library) Books."
Go me!

I'm teh bomb

Last night, Michael and I were talking before going to bed. Like usual.

At one point, I must have been teasing him ... and I remarked something to the effect of, "I laugh at you. That must be the hardest part of this relationship." Or something play-snarky like that.

And he responds: "No, that would be the mood swings."

Me: *laughs*

Him: "It's only funny because it's true!"

Me: *laughs* "Yeah ... You're so right."

He is, you know. I can't argue it at all.
I don't know why he puts up with me more than half the time. But I'm glad he does.

We also talked about the pre-date we went on ... and I asked, since we were also talking about having a sense of humor, if we were snarking about the teen fashion magazines I was reading with him in the van.

We were.

"Well, it's good to start a relationship on the right foot like that." I said.

We still snark very well. If they started a new series of Mystery Science Theater 3000, we could be most excellent. And we wouldn't need to employ any robots, either. :)

Besides, some movies just BEG to be made fun of. Like any movie based on a comic book or video game that attempts to take itself completely seriously. (Do you hear me, Daredevil? I'm casting some glares in your general direction. You're not far behind either, Ghostrider.)

---------------------------------------------

And, for a quick glimpse into my past ... an instance of pure brilliance and wit, I give you a snippet of conversation with a guy that I kinda dated before Michael and I met:

Scene: His apartment. His roommates are home, but not in the living room as we're cuddling.

Him: We shouldn't be doing this here (referring to the cuddling. There's no smoochin' or anything ... what IS his problem?).

Me: (without thinking) Do we need to go out to your van?

*PAUSE*

Him: *speechless* (I think he started to swallow his tongue)

Me: *starts cracking up. Because I can't keep a straight face. Since I was JUST THAT brilliant and witty and amazing. And that doesn't happen ALL the time. So I especially appreciate it when I am.*

Yeah. Sometimes I amaze myself.
I like it when I do that.

I'm, like, FAMOUS!!!

Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

Guess what? No! Not that!

Go here. Read down a little ... that second line under the bold "Children's Letters to Raven-Simone.

YES!! I'm that Allanna!!!!

Eric D. Snider totally mentioned me. I'm his "devoted reader"!! (I SO totally am. Ask Bri, Michael or my Mom!)

Squeeeeeee!!!

Michael laughed at how excited I got.

(Yeah, so what if I have a wee celebrity crush on one of the funniest, most satirical humor writers [and he's LDS!] out there?)

I'm such a fan-girl. I don't know if that makes me cooler or less.
But I've pink, puffy-hearted Eric for YEARS.

AND HE TOTALLY MENTIONED ME IN HIS BLOG!!!!!!!!

*does the happy dance*

Okay, now I need to go watch So You Think You Can Dance. Sabra and Dominic are quickly become contenders for my favorite couple (Hok and Jamie will need to stay strong. And I would like Lacey, as the sole Latter-Day Saint, to do well).

Not quite a Walk in the Park ...

So, Tuesday, T calls me up and asks if we want to play (T is only one of my bestest friends ... and has a little boy about six months older than my munchkin brigade). We arrange to meet in the next town over and let the kids play in the fountain/water play area by the riverfront.

 

As you can tell, Bruise and Bucket weren't quite all into it. You can tell since Bucket's close to tears and is running to me so I'll pick her up again.

I ended up holding the both of them (except when T held Bruise) and trying to get them to at least put their hands and feet into the streams of water from the little fountains ... in the process, getting the front of my denim shorts completely soaked. Enough so that, if seen in the right light (since they're a dark wash-type of denim), it totally looked like I had wet myself.

After a few minutes of J (T's son) having fun ... but not as much fun as we had hoped... It was crowded and the other kids there were screaming and running into each other (and ME) ... Well, we decided to head somewhere a little less crowded.

After the kiddos all had their snacks. T had a kid's meal for J with apple juice. Bruise and Bucket had some more peanut butter crackers (you know, like Oreos ... but with fake Ritz cracker with PB filling) and their water bottles.

Here are Bucket and Bruise enjoying the waterfront. (FINALLY.)

  

SO, after we let the kids eat, we took off for Central Park. I put Bruise and Bucket in the swing ... Unfortunately, Bucket was starting to get a little tired ... Or else maybe she just really doesn't like swings? I haven't figured that out. Let's just say that the swing didn't last all that long. (I think maybe about three minutes. Bruise would have enjoyed staying in longer, but, well ... it just wasn't in the cards.)

We would have had the kids play on the slide of in the sand, but with the sun baking it all, J's feet were hurting in his sandals ... and neither T nor I wanted to deal with BTS (burnt tushie syndrome), so the play equipment and the sand were out.

So we let them run in the grass in the shade.

 

 

As you can see, Bucket's a little flirt. I'm gonna have to watch out for her. For all the little boys' sakes.

I didn't put up the pictures of the train going by ... but the kiddos all enjoyed seeing it chug on past. Bruce was THRILLED. He wanted to run to it, pointing.
But mean, cruel mother that I am, I wasn't going to let him throw himself into traffic or onto the tracks.

Yes, I am just that mean. But I did take blurry pictures of his little hand and arm pointing to the wonder and glory that is a chain of open train cars going by.

Now I just have to wonder ... are my children really anti-social? Or was it the cold water they didn't like? Or were the other children being too loud and running around too much? Or Have I just trained my babies to be more comfortable around adults and small numbers of children?

Great ... Now I'm being all neurotic. Great.
I think I'm going to fantasize about eating an entire half gallon of ice cream now. Just to calm myself down.

Or I could play with my kidlets. That would probably be the best idea. ^_^

Conversations before unconsciousness hits

Since, for most of the week, Michael's gone for about 12 hours (including commute time. *sigh* But he likes his coworkers and job, so I'm NOT complaining. Especially since he's the breadwinner. He gets the bacon, I cook it up and try to have a clean-ish home to serve it in. Works for me.), a good deal of our talking takes place right before we fall asleep.

Since, by this point, we're pretty tired ... well, our conversations can get pretty entertaining.

Here are some of the highlights of the week:

Michael quoting from ... I think it's from Wizard: (as Batman) "The Batnipples: I use them to distract my enemies!"
(In reference to the ... evolution of the Batman costume. Specifically to how I still crush on Chris O'Donnell in Batman Forever. *le sigh* ... Yeah. I know I'm not a teenager anymore. But oh, my friends, how I pined to be rescued by Robin. ... Well, that is, if I couldn't be rescued by Gambit ... with his hott Cajun accent and his woo-ing ways. *double le sigh*)

Or, and my friend Stevie should appreciate this. Or anyone from my high school theater department, really...
I had asked Michael, all teasing, "Does that make you feel ... sexual?
And he replies, "I'm a guy. Everything makes me feel sexual."
Yeah, I still laugh about that.
(Back story for people NOT from high school drama: During one play, for whatever reason, Stevie started asking people, after any observation [i.e., "I like cheese" or "It's kinda warm today"], "Does that make you feel [pause for effect] sexual??"

Yeah, I don't know what happened that brought it to her mind to ask people that ... but it is still funny today. Very funny, indeed.

So, yeah.
Oh, and if you haven't already gotten sucked into the wonderful-ness-essence that is Brotherhood 2.0, get thee hence! (I highly recommend the video with Hank singing about Helena, Montana -- partly because it's a catchy, cute song. Partly because you see NEIL GAIMAN! [And, as I have hitherto mentioned, I have a bit of a hero-worship crushlet on that man.])

Or else you could listen to John talk about Nerd Fighters ... he sings a bit. It made MY MOM laugh. Which proves that it's not just my strange sense of humor (since I personally think that LOLcats are HIlarious ... and my mom doesn't get it at all. Neither does Michael, really. But Eric does! YAAAAAAY!!!!)

Speaking of Eric D. Snider (even if I was doing that in parentheses), he totally responded to an email I wrote him (Yes, I AM that much of a fan-girl for him), in which I wrote that I was glad that I'm not the only one liking LOLcats, with "I'm in ur email, reedin ur messages".

Oh yes, I'm still thrilled beyond belief with that. Even if it's been a few months since that happened.
Yes, Eric D. Snider did SO respond to me. More than once!!

I can't tell if I'm cooler because he responded to me ...
Or if I'm more of a nerd because I'm SO! FLIPPIN'! EXCITED! that he has responded to my emails in the past.

Oh!!! And if you want a GREAT book ... and you like romance and stuff ... you should SO. TOTALLY. READ. (And buy!!!) Austenland by Shannon Hale. (I've read her other books -- her Juvenile and Young Adult books. The "Goose Girl series" and "The Princess Academy." I can't complain about ANY of them.) (AND she has another book coming out this fall!!)

And, if you don't mind some profanity and ... um ... stuff you wouldn't want your children doing at college (let alone high school), you should totally read Looking for Alaska by John Green (yeah, the John I referred to in Brotherhood 2.0). I'm looking forward to getting my hands on a copy of An Abundance of Katherines (his second book), too.

Okay, maybe later I'll just do a post of books that you SHOULD. TOTALLY. READ.
But I'm tired of typing now.

Oh, and I went to the local farmer's market today. We got berries and tomatoes. Yum. Bruise is ALL about eating his weight in berries. (I don't think I get enough for that, though.)

Happy Father's Day!

Why my husband totally wins the Father of the Year award (and I'm not being ironic, like I am usually when I talk about how I am soooooo deserving of the Mother of the Year award).

Seriously, though. Michael is DA BOMB(!!!1) when it comes to being a daddy. It's like he's been training for this his entire life (As opposed to be, where I feel like I walked into this final after just skimming the material once or twice, in between playing video games and high-fiving my friends).

To prove that I'm right (about Michael rocking the Daddyhood-dom-ness, not about me playing video games), here's my photographic evidence:

 

Michael lets me browse through the library while he colors with the kiddos. AND he makes sure to give me their artwork before we leave. So, if I EVER start scrapbooking, I have their early work.
And he doesn't complain about how short/small those chairs are.

 

Look at how much Bucket LOVES being around her daddy.
I mean, really, what else can I say?

(Well, besides the fact that his DNA contribution mellows out my drama-queen DNA and makes my kids the cutest EVER. I mean, yeah, Bruise looks more like me at times ... but Bucket takes after her daddy's side SO much. They're a good mix. Meaning that they took the best of everything out of that chromosomal slush and worked it, baby!)

 

Bruise hangs out with Daddy as much as he can. And who can blame him when his Daddy loves him this much? Our kiddos have confidence enough to explore and to be friendly because we've tried hard to make sure they know that they're safe. And Michael's done wonders with them. (And me, too. Heavens above! If he didn't come home to relieve me from parenting duties, I think the world would end.) (No. REALLY.)

 

Michael's also very awesome because he does so much of parenting off-camera. I couldn't even start to describe how great of a daddy he is using only pictures.

He makes Bruise and Bucket laugh. He is always available for hugs and cuddles and kisses. He works to try and understand what they kidlets are thinking in order to help to fully meet their needs ... I could go on and on. But I'll stop before I embarrass him (in case he does read this. ^_^).

In conclusion, I lucked out in the husband/father of my children department. I got a man who enjoys Firefly, one who can snark to cheer me up, one who adores me (which flatters me), and one that I never thought I'd find ... especially since I really don't deserve him (but I'm SO glad he loves me regardless!).

Happy Father's Day, my love!
Bucket, Bruise and I are so glad that we have you!

Picture me and you ... Well, how about my kidlets instead?

Well, I think I owe y'all some pictures, still, right?
Here you go! I hope you enjoy then (not like you could enjoy them half as much as I usually enjoy the subjects!).

Yesterday morning, this is what I got to see --
Obviously Bucket had her hand under her cheek as she slept. Not only was it red and hand-shaped, but you could see where her knuckles were ... and it was INDENTED into her face. Ha! She's hilarious. And not only because she has these dainty little hands whose prints fit all on her cheek!

 

And here's Bruise. I love how happy my little man is. He's especially happy when he can wrestle a teething ring away from Bucket (probably so she won't beat him over the head with it, most likely).

 

This is one of the best reasons for extended breastfeeding.
I mean, seriously! Look at those peepers on that boy!

 

Yeah, I'm still at it, enjoying the extra bonding and cuddles that I get.
And, you know, it's so, so NICE to feel so NEEDED. And to know that I actually am doing something right.
(Yes, this does make the mastitis worth it. Totally.)

And, in closing, this is just about the best photo EVER(!!!1) of my Bucket.

 

Yeah, she's gorgeous. Everyone tells us so. And she knows it, too.
That's why I have to tell her that she's clever AND pretty.
(Also, I do remind her that "Pretty is as pretty does." Even though I'm Yankee, I can teach her good Southern morals [which will please one and one-half sets of her great-grandparents]. ^_^)

Any ideas on the best place to donate articificial baby milk (a.k.a.: f0rmula) that I never used/never will use?
It seems silly to let it go to waste (and take up room in my pantry) when there are other people out there who could use it. Should I just check the yellow pages for shelters?
(It is a little bit of a pressing issue, since some of it expires in July.) Thanks!

Quote: endurance

“I found then as I have found out many times since, that one can endure almost anything.” -- Spencer W. Kimball, on the death of his mother.

What a good quote to recall when I face my trials. I need to remember it more often.

Blood is Thicker Than Breastmilk

... You might not want to ask me how I know this.

An alternate title for today could be "My First Mastitis."

Yesterday, as I loaded the kiddos up (directly post-nap, since I didn't have time to nurse them before we went for their 15/18 month [it was combined. Which saves me $40 in insurance co-pay. Which makes me happy. Since I could use that $40 for shoes. Or books. Or diapers] appointment.)...

(If this entry doesn't read very clearly, bear with me. My brain's still a little fuzzy-feeling.)

As I was saying, I didn't have time to nurse them. Not a huge deal, I was feeling a wee bit engorged (with little lighting bolts of discomfort), but we got to the doctor's just a little bit late. Their appointment went well. They've gained weight (both are leaner than they are tall. Bruise is 1.5 inches taller and 1 pound heavier than Bucket. They have perfect eardrums and are very healthy and happy. They even said "Bye" as their pediatrician left the office. He said that my kids are, and I quote, "So cool." ... That made me happy).
After the kiddos got their shots (DTAP, HiB [which I found out today they didn't need that dose. Oops. No charge, though. Phew!], and their first Hep A), I nursed then a little and, oh, did one side HURT.

Of course, Bucket was throwing a tantrum (complete with laying on the ground, screaming, while kicking her little feet) and Bruise was bawling ... so we got out of there.

I felt VERY tired and a little dizzy as we drove home. I tried to feed the munchkins one more time (as they were still rather hysterical) and then I put them to nap, since I was really useless.

With how much my breast hurt, I figured maybe I had a plugged duct, thinking back to a post that Chris from the Trenches wrote. So I ran a hot bath and worked at hand expressing all that I could to get that duct clear.
Then I got close to passing out (from the hot water, the "discomfort," and trying to heft my 180-pound self out of the tub. So I laid down and slept until Michael got home. I had him give me a blessing and call the clinic to see if maybe I could get a prescription and to get information. Everything kinda blurs together (probably on account of the fever I had. It got up to 104.4 ... I don't think I've had a fever like that since I was Bruise and Bucket's age).

After a second bath and pumping and hand-expressing ... and a cooler shower to help me feel less passy-outy, I felt better. That and Michael gave me some food. Which certainly helped. I had some ibuprofen and was able to socialize with my husband and babies.

Michael had been working at finding a diagnosis through Web M.D., and he was a little worried that the first diagnosis at the top of the list was cancer. Since I researched like crazy (like, I started reading about breastfeeding YEARS before I actually started), I was pretty sure it was either a clogged/plugged duct or mastitis. The only symptom that didn't fit so well (and that got Web M.D. to try and worry my husband) was that the duct that was kinda plugged ... well, instead of breastmilk, it produced blood.

Just to put it rather bluntly, it's disturbing to pump milk that looks like cream of tomato soup. Milk is not supposed to be rusty-pink. (However, I think that I've gotten that cleared up. ... If not, since I'm still nursing, if there are any reports of vampire toddlers ... well, yeah. That'll probably be my fault.)

And, letting that pink milk sit out ... well, the science geek in me was a little impressed to find out for sure that blood is denser than milk. I mean, it makes sense ... I mean, there's more iron in it and everything...

So, today I went to the doctor's. I saw the newest addition to the staff (the receptionist and nurses barely recognized me without my mini-mes following). She was pretty cool. Got my diagnosis, some tips to make the time go by a little easier (pump and nurse all you can, keep the milk flowing, hot baths and compresses ... if it's not better in a week, come in again...), we covered painkiller options (since I still have some of the big-gun painkiller left over from when Bruise and Bucket were born, I can take half-tablets of that ... or the usual ibuprofen and tylenol (Same ol', same ol' ... I'm getting to be a bit of an expert of regular medicines you can take while nursing.)
(As I should be, since I've been doing this for almost 17 months now.)

I saw the really nice pharmacist at Target (why not get prescriptions there? It's practically next door ... and I like the bottles. They're genius!). She took the same antibiotic when she had an infection after her daughter was born.
I really like her. She's probably my mom's age. She's awesome. (The pharmacist. ... AND my mom, to be honest.)

I'm going to take it easy on housework. Just a little folding, cooking, a load of dishes (relax! It's in the dishwasher!!), and picking up the living room's toy explosion extravaganza(!!!!).

Well, my brain is getting cloudy-esque again. I should go take a nap.

I really hope that mastitis never rears its gnarly head among this household or the households of anyone I know ... or anyone that anyone I know knows.
For ever and ever. Amen.

Oh, it's raining. I like how it sounds.

Um ... This is a little embarassing.

I just need to get this off of my chest.

I have a little, teensy crush.

On Neil Gaiman.

That is all.

(Oh, I feel SO much better! Thanks!)

More (mostly animal) Pictures

 

Bucket really liked the lion. Too bad the one picture I got of him not sleeping wasn't that good.

 

This Siberian tiger is gorgeous. Check out his pretty blue eyes. (My babies have competion now. Ha ha ha)

 

There were peacocks all over the park. All strutting their stuff for the lady birds. I took advantage of that fact and got some nice pictures (At least I think they're nice. So does Michael. And my mom ...)

 

I love this one of Bucket running after her Daddy and Bruise (who Michael's following toward the beach cave). It was a gorgeous day in Bandon. (This is on the beach at the Face Rock viewpoint. Michael and I were here on our honeymoon.)

Say Cheese!

 

Bucket and Bruise checking out the ROUSes (Rodents of Unusual size, if you didn't get the Princess Bride reference. Which would be, of itself, an utter travesty).

 

My pretty Bucket. I'd say I'm biased, but everyone remarks on what a pretty, pretty little girl she is. No pressure, though. (Even though I have no problem hearing it more. She doesn't either.)

 

My handsome Bruise (so-named since he's like me -- less than graceful). He's such a sweet boy. (Well, as long as he's not pushing his sister. Or pulling books or videos off the shelves. ... So, MOST of the time, he's a sweet, even-tempered boy who loves to laugh and run around.)

 

Here we are (look!! I have a new haircut! Aren't I the cutest?!? ... Well, except for the two darlings next to me and the Desert Lynx kitten, Kenya, that I'm holding, that is. <--- Wow, that's a lot of commas. Sorry!!). I have to say, Kenya was supersoft. Such a playful little guy. Bruise was more interested in Kenya's toys. Bucket LOVED petting the nice kitty, though.

Why Motherhood is Good ...

As I threw some paper into our recycling box (yes, I am an Oregonian. Ergo, I recycle. Or feel insanely guilty when I fail to recycle everything-that-possibly-could-be-recycled!!!), Bucket stood a the baby gate and clapped her hands.

Yes. I got a standing ovation for throwing away paper. Which I had asked her to do (and she sometimes will put it over the gate ... and I'll move it to the trashcan or the recycling box, depending on what it is).

It's been years since I've been in a production. Since I've sung in a choir.

Applause feels so gosh-darn good.

Now, for a REAL post ...

It's been a little since I've actually blogged about ME and my life ... but I've filled in with quizzes pretty well, no?

Memorial Day weekend, we spent Friday through Sunday visiting family. We drove down Thursday night to my mom's. Got to meet her puppy that Cecil got her for Mother's Day. The puppy's name is Honey (according to Mom) or Poop (according to Cecil). Cute dog, really. Part pug, part terrier, part toy poodle. You can see the pug and the terrier more than the poodle.

Friday, while Mom was at work and Cecil was cutting grass at the graveyard, we went up to Roseburg and visited my Nana, Uncle Steve, Dad and LaVonne. Bucket and Bruise got to run amok outside in Nana's backyard, which they LOVED! They also ate close to their body weight in pasta and fruit. (Note: watermelon isn't a big hit. Yet. But they like strawberries, which we knew.)

Saturday, we headed out to the coast. We went to the West Coast Safari and Game Park (where Michael and I had gone on our honeymoon). Bucket LOVED seeing (and petting) the animals. Bruise loved being able to run around. I took over 200 pictures that day. Most of the kids and animals, some of Face Rock and plants and such.

Sunday we went to church at my home ward. When Sunday School was starting, I was still making my way out of the chapel. Buena called out that it was nice to see my back side (since I wasn't facing the front as I gathered up my stuff and Bucket). I, being the circumspect and dainty lady that I am, responded "It's my best side!"

Pictures will be posted soon. NOT ones of my back side. :P

After church, we took off for home and relaxed a bit. Forgot to put out the garbage for the garbage truck. Oops.

Monday we weeded part of the yard and fed the missionaries. Chinese food. Michael even made fortune cookies. One of the elders, since we copied the fortunes posted at WhiteShoe.org, pulled the fortune reading, "Satan is pleased with what you've done."
I got, "Creature in Black Lagoon get woman in final scene. What your problem??" Michael got "Confucius' wife say 'Enough advice already! Get hobby!'" The other missionary got "Swankiness is not necessarily a good quality." Fun stuff.

I sunburned part of the back yanking weeds. Right above my hips, where my shirt rode up as I was bent over. Oops.

And we left all the leftover out overnight. So they had to be thrown out. :( Good thing we had eaten a good portion of it. Next time, though, I need to spice up the egg flower soup. It was super bland. Ick!

Somehow I already knew this one ...

Take the Quiz here!

iPod Survey ... or whatever you have your music on, really

INSTRUCTIONS:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn’t make sense. NO CHEATING!

How do you feel today?
Outro - India.Arie

What’s your outlook on life?
Babara Ann - The Regents (Why not "take a chance"?)

What does your family think of you?
Suicide Is Painless - The Mash (Maybe they "can take or leave" me if they please?)

What do your friends think of you?
Wanna B Ur Lover - Weird Al Yankovic (Maybe I'm just THAT popular. And I DO have nice nostrils ...)

What do your exes think of you?
Honor to Us All - Mulan (Disney) (Yeah, I am JUST that good. You can't deny it. :P)

How’s your love life?
Jurassic Park (Theme) - John Williams (... Um... So, full of dinosaurs? O.o)

How will your love life be in the future?
What Child Is This - Vanessa Williams (Hopefully one of my own, I'd hope)

Will you get married?
Easy, Bruno, Easy - Ben Charest (I should tell my unmarried friends to use that response. )

Are you good at school?
Parrot (Oh Not Again!) - Monty Python's Flying Circus (I can parrot lots of pedagogy, true!)

Will you be successful?
Ballad of Jayne - L.A. Guns (Doesn't sound so promising ... )

What song should they play on your birthday?
Crash - Gwen Stefani

What song should they play at your graduation?
Oh Lately It's So Quiet - OK Go

The Soundtrack of your life?
Underneath Your Clothes - Shakira

You and your best friends are?
Let Your Light So Shine - Janice Kapp Perry

Happy times:
Dream Lover - Mariah Carey

Sad times:
Your Song - Ewan McGregor (I think, if I were sad, McGregor singing would make me much happier!)

Every day:
Six Little Ducks - Raffi (Oh, the humanity. Even though I do like Raffi)

For tomorrow:
A Wink and a Smile - Harry Connick Jr. (Such a nice song!)

For you:
Truly Madly Deeply - Savage Garden

What does next year have in store for me?
Pretty Donna - Collective Soul

What do I say when life gets too hard?
Rapper's Delight - Ellen Dow & The Sugar Hill Gang (from the soundtrack to The Wedding Singer... There's nothing like hearing an octogenarian rapping. Oh, yes.)

What song will I dance to at my wedding?
You're My Soul and Inspiration - The Righteous Brothers (They lie! It was Elvis' "Can't Help Falling in Love.")

What do you want as your career?
For the First Time - Kenny Loggins ("For the first time, looking in your eyes" ... sounds like I'll be pursuing that career as an ophthalmologist.)

Your favorite saying?
Brahm's Lullaby (Intro)/Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (Again, LIES. It would be something along the lines of "Craptastic!")

How will I die?
Handy Man - Jimmy Jones ( ... So I'll be bludgeoned to death by a serial killer in disguise? Utterly craptastic. Just bloody great. Better get that big life insurance policy NOW. While I still can. ... And I can never trust that Maytag repairman now. Great.)

SO, if you feel like joining me in this insanity, consider yourself tagged!
(If you don't want to ... then I'm sure not going to force you! If I DID, well, maybe you'd be lining up to crack my skull while fixing my faucet or something. Dang that handyman!!)

Who am I?

So, if I were one of those famous actresses of yesteryear ...

Your Score: Carole Lombard

You scored 7% grit, 28% wit, 38% flair, and 33% class!

You're a little bit of a fruitcake, but you always act out in style. You have a good sense of humor, are game for almost anything, but you like to have nice things about you and are attracted to the high life. You're stylish and modern, but you've got a few rough edges that keep you from attaining true sophistication. Your leading men include William Powell, Fredric March, and Clark Gable. Watch out for small planes.

Find out what kind of classic leading man you'd make by taking the
Classic Leading Man Test.

Link: The Classic Dames Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

And if I were a boy ....

Your Score: Jimmy Stewart

You scored 21% Tough, 0% Roguish, 61% Friendly, and 19% Charming!

You are the fun and friendly boy next door, the classic nice guy who still manages to get the girl most of the time. You're every nice girl's dreamboat, open and kind, nutty and charming, even a little mischievous at times, but always a real stand up guy. You're dependable and forthright, and women are drawn to your reliability, even as they're dazzled by your sense of adventure and fun. You try to be tough when you need to be, and will gladly stand up for any damsel in distress, but you'd rather catch a girl with a little bit of flair. Your leading ladies include Jean Arthur and Donna Reed, those sweet girl-next-door types.

Find out what kind of classic dame you'd make by taking the
Classic Dames Test.

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Truly, I think that I'd make a better leading man. Jimmy Stewart's pretty darn cool.

Your Personality is Somewhat Rare (ESFP)

Your personality type is playful, charming, open minded, and energetic. Only about 7% of all people have your personality, including 9% of all women and 5% of all men You are Extroverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Perceiving.

How Rare Is Your Personality?

Well, we knew I was unique ... Not just "unique". :P

I'm really not *that* dumb ...

Yesterday as I was getting ready to leave for my Cub Scout meeting, I was buzzing around in my pre-leaving state of panic, trying to get everything squared away and all.

I look at the digital display over the hall light switch and promptly freak the Helen out.

For like a split second.

Then I had to tell Michael my thought process. Since I'm really this insane:

"69°!!! I'm going to be late!!"

Yes.

I kid you not.

Obviously, I'm very scared of being late. And I KNOW that the pack meeting starts at 7 P.M. And my brain, in that state of flurry, cannot determine the difference between a clock and a THERMOMETER.

*sigh*

I'm so ashamed sometimes.

Hallelujah!

The girl is over being sick.

Thank goodness!

I'm so glad that it only took five days, one Father's blessing, one blessing from the Home Teachers (not these ones), two suppositories, and just shy of five bajillion loads of laundry.

I'm glad to have my Fuss Bucket, my Giggle Bucket, my happy girl back.
I think that my Bruiser is glad to have her back, too. Since he gets more Mommy-time and feedings again, now that she's back to normal.

Funny thing, at church yesterday ... Well, there's a gal. We both have kids close to the same age. I think her son's three weeks younger than my brood. He's ENTRANCED with Bucket's hair. He kept stalking her and winding his fingers in her hair ... and then yanking. (Don't get me wrong. I don't like it when people hurt my kiddos. But A (the boy) ... well, Bucket's held her own against him before. She doesn't have to play dainty around him. She's pushed him pretty good. Even though he's bigger than either her or Bear).
After A'd wind his fingers in her hair and yank (sometimes yanking Bucket off-balance), I'd just distract her with an animal cracker. She's a tough girl. No screaming. God stuff.

After the ... oh, I've lost count. No matter. ... Maybe fourth/fifth time, A's mom chased after him (as I administered more crackers with my chilled-out-mum attitude) in the church hallway, muttering "Dammit!!"

I said nothing. Until we got home. Then I asked Michael if my ears deceived me.

I think I'm ready to start a club. The Church Cursers. If you've ever said something inappropriate in church, you've free to come join. I'll even accept honorary-Church-cursers into my club. Or if you've heard someone and didn't die of shock (If you DID, you're welcome to join as a posthumous member. But we'd prefer a post-humorous member. ... Like you giggled afterwards. We like that. ... Since that's my first response on hearing swears. Uncontrolled, semi-hysterical giggling.) (Yes, I am just THAT mature.) (And here I go talking in parentheses AGAIN.)

I get to be President, since it IS my club. And I'm the one that said "crap" while teaching a Sunday School class about JESUS ... Well, it was the Old Testament, and He's mentioned in there quite a bit. But it does take some gall to say "... and that's a load of crap," while teaching a class at church.

When no one batted an eyelash, I relaxed. And figured that I could say "crap" as often as I desired. But I try to refrain from using it in talks in Sacrament meeting. Just so I don't cause any of the elderly folk to have an stroke, heart attack or seizure.

Because I'm just that kind.

In other news, I'm just about caught up on laundry! YAY!!!! And we finally put up my big bookshelf in the bedroom. I need to add more shelves to it. Like THREE. And get a smaller bookshelf in there. (And about five more bookshelves ... to fit the rest of my addictions [i.e., books].)

I need to do dishes. Especially since the kids are napping. And I could change out of my PJs and do some yard work. Like weeding. Or trimming/pruning.

Or, I could unload the dishwasher, take a quick shower and lie on my bed in a towel and maybe finish my book about vampires. And start another book about vampires. Yard work can wait until the munchkins' second nap, right?

Who would you invite?

If you were able to have a party (how about a surprise party) thrown for you, and you could have a celebrity guest list (and time period is not a factor), who would make your list?

If I had my druthers, it'd be a large, round table (for optimum chattage) and I surround myself with humor and accents. Because I'm that odd.

Here's my list (in no particular order):
Rowan Atkinson
Hugh Laurie
Will Ferrell
J. Golden Kimball
Oscar Wilde
Stephen Fry
Jack Black

Now, obviously, I just like to hang with the guys. Why is this?

Some ladies that could make this soirée would be Lisa Kudrow and Emma Thompson. And Zooey Deschenel.

Now, since I'm writing this on a day where I'm up to my elbows in laundry to fold and have children that need attention and all ... I'm sure that I've forgotten some celebs.
(If you're a celebrity and feel hurt, I'm sorry. It's nothing personal. Unless you're Lindsey Lohan or Britney Spears. Because you are role models to little girls and should behave yourselves in a responsible manner. For shame!)

If you're not a celebrity, and you feel like catering to my whims, which celebrities would make your party list? What kind of party would it be? (As you can tell, I enjoy being surrounded by wit and intelligence ... and, mostly, people who make me laugh. I also am not into raging parties ... but you might be. If so, who'd you want there?)

Let's make a tally

Days Bucket's been a puke-bucket: 5.25
(She had thrown up in bed [again] bust hasn't since. [knock on wood]).
How many times she's thrown up in the past 5.25 days: About 20.
How many loads of laundry I've done in the last 5.25 days: around 10
(when I usually do around 4 loads per week)
How many family members she's infected: 1 - Michael
How many days Michael took off of work: 2
How many times I cried from being burnt-out: 5
How many pills she was given for nausea: 6, with an option to refill.
How many of those she's taken: 1
In how many doses: 2 (1/2 dose for my little girl)

How many times I want to administer this: -5 bazillion

Why: The medicine is a suppository.

Yes, I have to Vaseline up my finger and the half of the suppository and guide it past her little sphincter as she cries and screams.

Not fun? Ohhhh... "Not fun" is a huge understatement.

Suppository is to "not fun":: Being boiled alive in a volcanic eruption is to "feeling a tad bit warm.

But I don't think that even that amount of understatement covers this travesty.

Feel free to come up with a better one.

In the midst of the barf-dom ...

I had my hopes up since Bucket was more of a grumble-bucket than a puke bucket that all of the puke had passed.

Not quite. I got to wash her face and hair (and my chest and the Boppy) after a good 24+ hours of no barf. But, it's still an improvement. I'm hoping that she keeps down this last feeding, though. She's pretty miserable.

And so I'm going to share some quizzes. Since I'm "productive." (Read: those were irony quotes.)

Your Score: Pure Nerd

60 % Nerd, 43% Geek, 30% Dork

For The Record:



A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.

A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.

A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.


You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd.



The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful.
Congratulations!
Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST

Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

So, obviously, I need to get my geek on, just a little more often.
Still, I scored 99% higher than my peers on nerdiness, geekdom, AND dork points.
Well, everyone has to be good at SOMETHING. Maybe I've found my niche.

I am a Snapdragon What Flower Are You?

Well, I'm this or A Canna ... or a Sunflower. But speaking of ... maybe I can plant some snapdragons in our yard sometime. Maybe along the street-side of our house. Or some hollyhocks. Something with some height and color. Or climbing roses ... Of course, these all depend on if I'm willing to put out the effort, time, and money. And making a decision. :P

A Different Man I Love ...

A nice quote:

"I can do anything I am set apart to do, if I have the spirit of my appointment and am humble and prayerful."

—J. Golden Kimball (CR, April 1918, p. 133.)

See, J. Golden's not always a potty-mouth. ^_^ I really love this guy.
He's got the reputation of being this Democrat, always-speaking-his (sometimes inappropriate)-opinion, wild child (for a Latter-Day Saint).

I just think he's so genuine. He makes me feel better as I'm on the path to perfection (and start to feel that my road has more twists and turns than my neighbor's).

That, and I love to repeat those J. Golden Kimball stories. Oh, to be a fly on the wall in meetings with Golden, Heber J. Kimball, and Rutger Clawson...

Sacreligious ... Take one!

Scene: Our home, living room. Kids are napping. I'm checking out comments for the latest Brotherhood 2.0 vlog. Michael's reading Angels and Demons by Dan Brown.

Michael: Are there some religious questions that you just shouldn't ask?

Me: *thinks for a sec* Like, about the size of God's package?

Michael: *pauses* Only you could come up with one.

Picture This

Here we are.

Michael, Bucket, me, and Bruiser (flexing his impressive triceps for da ladies).

I really hate it when I blink as someone takes my picture.

Oh well.

But, seriously, do I not have some of the cutest twins in all twindom?
Bruise gets smiles from all the ladies (He's a charmer!) and everyone remarks on how pretty Bucket is (even people who don't HAVE to!).

And that handsome man there, scruffy though he may be. He's a keeper.

Now, just how do I love that five-hundred extra pounds? (It does not help that I watched America's Next Top Model last night. ... Skinny little girls. That's insane, that they're so TINY!)

I am Allanna. Witness my insecutiries. Bow down before the greatness of my lackage of self-confidence!

But I have a great husband and adorable offspring.

So it's not all bad.

Or even half-way bad.

The Barf Chronicles

We took Bucket to the doctor's today.

We have a great doctor. A busy one (we arrived a little late for our appointment. We still waited about 20+ minutes to see him), but a very nice and competent man.

Bucket, our little puke and poop bucket, has indeed caught the stomach bug (virus, of course. Something that antibiotics wouldn't clear up) that's going around.

I feel bad because I think she caught it when I took her and Bruiser to play group last week. The virus lay dormant for a couple of days and -- BAM!!-- hit my girl with full force.

But, even though she's not keeping much (if anything) down, she's not dehydrated. She even can call up tears and everything. She's just puking and miserable. (And HATED being prodded with a stethoscope.

So, even though I'm guilty because I took her out where she got it, I'm a good mom because I've worked very hard to try and keep her hydrated. Go me.

Our washer's getting its workout. I think we've done at least eight loads of wash, starting Saturday morning.

Michael just came down with the bug, too. Good thing he stayed home today (to help take Bucket to the Doctor's. And to help me keep my sanity).

Bruiser and I are hanging in there. He seems none the worse for wear. I think most of it has to do with the fact that he and Bucket are still nursing. (Of course, this weekend hasn't been the best for Bucket's nursing. ... She's eating for maybe five minutes and --POW!!-- We're all covered in barf. Load up the washer again.) However, it seems that Baroo's gotten all the antibodies I can produce. Except for the few I've stocked away for myself. He's like the Energizer Bunny, immune system-wise. He's gotten a cold a couple of times. Always much more mild of a case than Bucket's.

I don't feel great. I don't know if it's due to (a) being so dang tired and (b) being a little burnt-out or (c) being on my ladies' cycle or (d) a touch of the bug. I'm not very hungry. I'm getting a little light-headed. I have a headache. It's nothing like Michael's case -- nausea, other ickies, whole-body-being sore.
I feel okay, but not like I'd be bringing my A-game to the table. If I ever DID bring my A-game anywhere.

But the good news is that I'm nearly caught up on the dishes. And I only have two loads of laundry to fold. And I have a prescription for Bucket for some anti-nausea medicine (DO NOT ask me how it's to be administered. If you can't guess, you DO NOT WANT TO KNOW). And another hold to pick up at the library. And I should vacuum. (Note: You don't want to walk around barefoot or in socks for a couple of days. And the "couple of days" ONLY applies if Bruiser doesn't catch this crud.)

Since the husband and the kids are asleep (well, Bruiser is ... I think he's doing some Gregorian chants ... in his crib), I'm signing off and laying on the couch to read/nap.

Changes ... changes ...

Since I last posted, my babies have turned one (they're actually 16 months old as of today), we've bought a house, moved to that house ... which meant changing wards (again this year) ... stuff like that.

I've gotten better at cleaning our house. Michael repairs the vacuum whenever I clog up the filters and think that I've broken it. I also get around to mopping and dusting a little more often (as opposed to just shy of never ... since with the kiddos this mobile, I'm walking around the house and noticing dirt so much more.

We upgraded to broadband internet ... since the dial-up we were on started topping out around the lightspeed-ness of, oh, 12 or 6 kb/sec. Yes. KILOBYTES. Per SECOND. SIX. Ugh.
And, so now, I can be online all day without blocking calls ... I can download music and pictures and, generally, be much, much happier. Since, I can actually *gasp* CHECK MY EMAIL.

I've started using my CrockPot more and more. It's so nice, if I remember to (1) decide what to make and (2) actually prepare meals early enough.

My BJ (friend) is preggers. And it looks like everything's going very well (which relieves my worries and makes me very happy). T is going to start working at having a little girl soon. C is having a little girl in ... August, I think. I think that those are all of my friends that are currently incubating/planning on incubating.

I have a bra fitting tomorrow. Yay for actually getting bras that FIT. And they can be used to nurse, too ... which is still going strong.

Bucket and Bruiser (my twinlets) are growing up so fast. Bucket's talking more than Bruiser, which is to be expected ...Girls often talk first and talk most. Most of her words are animal names and the sounds they make. Bruiser is more selective about what he says ... Mainly "Fee-see, Shi-shi" ("fishy, fishy"). We're still (and will continue to be) in the thralls of that joy that is teething. Most of the front teeth have come in on both Bruise and Bucket (Bruiser - getting that last bottom one. Bucket - That last bottom one should come in whenever and the third bottom one is working through). They're even cutting molars. It can get a little crazy.

I can't think of anything else to write. So I'm closing up.

Belated-ness

I'll open with the reason that I haven't blogged here in FOREVER.















They're cute, huh? (And even if you don't agree, just nod your head and smile, since I am the one who spent 36+/- weeks incubating this dynamic duo.)

My Bri is trying to get me to blog here on a more regular basis (she's even trying to persuade me to give up my Diaryland site! I've been there about three years, crazily enough. It started just as a place to blog crazy dreams, but is now my little blog-lifeline ... we'll see where my loyalty manifests itself.)

Now, I'm a little nervous about the whole picture uploading-thing. This is taking a dang long while. That scares me just a tad. Maybe you won't be seeing the reason thatI never have the time to blog anywhere except my primary (aka Diaryland).

Geez, I'm just blathering on and on, aren't I? I could just start talking about Bruiser and Bucket (the kiddos) ... but that's so ... sterotypical of motherhood, right?

Ah-HA! It's loaded!! Hmm, not the best pic of my Bucket ... she's really a very pretty baby. Just ask my Bri. She'll set you straight if you're in doubt.

Since I now KNOW that the pictures do load, I can load more later! (Since my sloooooooow connection takes just short of friggin' FOREVER.)

So, I'll just TELL you about my munchkins. (Oh, NOW the pics load. Of course, murphy's law.)




Bruiser-bear is older by two minutes. He's totally got the crawling-thing down, although it can sound funny. He'll slap down his right hand and left knee and then follow with a quick succession of left hand-then-right-knee. If you don't know what you're hearing, you could almost mistake it for Samara's limping gait in The Ring. He's a cuddler. Today he finally started talking with a consonant. He's been "Bah buh bahbuh uh uh uh"-ing all afternoon. His favorite thing? Food, definitely. He's such a flirt with the ladies (of any age and in any condition, really).



Bucket is the quintessial little princess, although her daddy is determined that she'll be able to take any guy or gal out there in a fair fight. And he's right. She has such determination and independence that it blows my mind. She loves bathtime and being free to do her own thing ... especially chasing after Diana-cat. Whenever Bucket falls, it's a Broadway production of a little crying fit. Unless she notices that no one's watching. (She'll be embarassed in about ten years that I write this, but this girl can projectile vomit!! She got her dad in the mouth once ... she's also got down my shirt and one of her grandmas' shirt, too! ... She's over that now, but if she gets too worked up, she'll cry until she throws up.) (I'm SURE she's glad that I've included that.)

I'm still a regular (or as regular as I can be) blogger over at diaryland. Like usual. I still haven't made the cross over. Yet. But I keep thinking about it.
Thinking long and hard. Very hard, indeed.

Until then, this is going to be a sporadic thing. Until I get myself in gear.